


3ᴀᴍ |ʏᴏᴏ ᴋɪʜʏᴜɴ|

by UwuSunshineMinho



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Age Difference, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety Attacks, Depression, F/M, Fluff, M/M, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-20
Updated: 2020-01-26
Packaged: 2021-02-27 09:48:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 23
Words: 27,955
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22325062
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UwuSunshineMinho/pseuds/UwuSunshineMinho
Summary: |ᵂⁱˡˡ ʸᵒᵘ ᵖˡᵉᵃˢᵉ ᵖⁱᶜᵏ ᵘᵖ ᵗʰᵉ ᶠᵘᶜᵏⁱⁿᵍ ᵖʰᵒⁿᵉ?|"Darling, I just left the bar. And I've misplaced all my credit cards. My self preservation and all of my reservations. Are sitting and contemplatin' what to do with me, do with me.""Think I took it way too far. And I'm stumbling drunk, getting in a car. My insecurities are hurting me. Someone, please come and flirt with me. I really need a mirror that'll come along and tell me that I'm fine.""I do it every time. I keep on hanging on the line. Ignoring every warning sign. Come on and make me feel alright again.""'Cause it's 3 a.m. And I'm calling everybody that I know. And here we go again. While I'm running through the numbers in my phone. And yeah I'll take fake moans and dial tones. Let 'em spill right down the microphone. I need it digital. 'Cause, baby, when it's physical. I end up alone, end up alone."Jasey Ryan Kim, is a seventeen year old girl who has been bouncing back and forth with living for her family and friends and just giving up and ending it all, and she just can't exactly figure out what her purpose was in the world, until she met Yoo Kihyun.
Relationships: Chae Hyungwon/Lee Hoseok | Wonho, Im Changkyun | I.M/Lee Jooheon, Jasey & Kihyun





	1. ＪＡＳＥＹ＇Ｓ ＰＲＯＦＩＬＥ

**ＪＡＳＥＹ＇Ｓ ＰＲＯＦＩＬＥ  
**

**=========================================**

**BASIC INFORMATION**

**=========================================**

**Full name: Jasey Ryan Kim**

**Nickname(s) or Alias: Gone Girl**

**Gender: Female**

**Species: Human**

**Age: 17**

**Birthday: August 12th, 2003**

**Sexuality: Straight**

**Nationality: South Korean**

**Religion: N/A**

**City or town of birth: Busan, South Korea**

**Currently lives: Seoul, south Korea**

**Languages spoken: Korean**

**Native language: Korean**

**Relationship Status: Single**

**=========================================**

**PHYSICAL APPEARANCE**

**=========================================**

**Height: 5’1 (154 cm)**

**Weight: 99 lbs (44 kg**

**Figure/build: Average**

**Hair colour: Brown hair (BLACK NATURALLY)**

**Hairstyle: Long**

**Eye colour: Brown and green (Heterochromia)**

**Skin colour: Pale Skin**

**Tattoos: A heart on her wrist**

**Piercings: Nose ring, and eyebrow piercing**

**Scars/distinguishing marks: A scar running from her eyebrow to her head when she split her head open**

**Preferred style of clothing: Comfortable Clothing**

**Frequently worn jewellery/accessories: Glasses**

**=========================================**

**HEALTH**

**=========================================**

**Smoker? Yes**

**Drinker? Sometimes**

**Recreational Drug User? Which? N/A**

**Addictions: N/A**

**Allergies: Fresh Fruits, Veggies, and Nuts (OAS)**

**Any physical ailments/illnesses/disabilities: Anxiety, Depression**

**Any medication regularly taken: Antidepressants**

**=========================================**

**PERSONALITY**

**=========================================**

**Personality: Intelligent, Sensitive, Emotional, lovable, Dull, and Cowardly**

**Likes: Food, Netflix, movies, music, and reading**

**Dislikes: school, herself**

**Fears/phobias: spiders, dying.**

**Favourite colour: burgundy**

**Hobbies: writing and reading**

**Taste in music: rock and pop**

**=========================================**

**SKILLS**

**=========================================**

**Talents/skills: Writing, reading 100 words in a minute**

**Ability to drive a car? Operate any other vehicles? N/A**

**=========================================**

**EATING HABITS**

**=========================================**

**Omnivore/Carnivore/Herbivore (Vegetarian): Omnivore**

**Favourite food(s): Ramen, Pizza, pasta, apples**

**Favourite drink(s): soda, Soju**

**Disliked food(s): Vegetables**

**Disliked drink(s): coffee**

**=========================================**

**HOUSE AND HOME**

**=========================================**

**Describe the character's house/home: She lives in a two story house, with a big front and back yard, that seems all colorful and lively, but that’s not what goes on.**

**Do they share their home with anyone? Who? She lives with both of her parents and her 4 brothers.**

**Significant/special belongings: N/A**

**=========================================**

**CAREER**

**Level of education: High school**

**=========================================**

**FAMILY, FRIENDS AND FOES**

**=========================================**

**Parents names:**

**Kim Jungwoo (Father)**   
****

**Kim Jinyoung (Step Father)**

**Lilly Ryan Kim (Mother)**

**Are parents alive or dead?**   
****

**Both of her parents are alive. Her father died when she was 3 years old.**

**Is the character still in contact with their parents?**   
****

**Barely talks to her mom and dad half of the time**

**Siblings? Relationship with siblings?**

**Kim Hyunjin (Brother): 21 years old (Great connection)**

**Kim Taehyuik (BROTHER): 13 years old (they are inseparable)**

**Daren Kim (BROTHER): 19 years old (They don’t get along)**

**Kim Jimin (Brother): 5 years old (Cute brother and sister relationship)**

**Best Friend: Im Changkyun**

**Other Important Friends:**

**Lee Jooheon**   
****

**Son Hyunwoo**

**Lee Minhyuk  
Lee Hoseok (WONHO)  
Chae Hyungwon**

**Acquaintances: Yoo Kihyun**

**Pets: A pet dog named Rose**

**Enemies? Why are they enemies?**   
****

**Jeon Jungkook. Jasey and Jungkook used to date in their freshman year of high school, until Jungkook cheated on her and they broke up in their sophomore year.**

**=========================================**

**BACKSTORY**

**=========================================**

**Describe their childhood (newborn - age 10):**

**NEWBORN: At 3:00 Pm Jasey Ryan Was Kim**   
****

**Age 3: Father dies of lung cancer**

**Age 5: Mother marries Kim Jinyoung  
Age 10: Splits her head open**

**Describe their teenage years (11 - 19):  
** **Age 11: Put on antidepressants  
** **Age 14: Starts dating Jeon Jungkook  
** **Gets Eyebrow Piercing  
** **Gets Nose Piercing  
** **Age 15: Breaks up with Jungkook  
** **Age 16: gets her first tattoo  
** **Age 17: Meets Yoo Kihyun  
** **TBC**


	2. ＫＩＨＹＵＮ＇Ｓ ＰＲＯＦＩＬＥ

****

**ＫＩＨＹＵＮ＇Ｓ ＰＲＯＦＩＬＥ  
**

**=========================================**

**BASIC INFORMATION**

**=========================================**

**Full name: Yoo Kihyun**

**Nickname(s) or Alias: Kiki**

**Gender: Male**

**Species: Human**

**Age: 19**

**Birthday: November 22nd, 2001**

**Sexuality: Straight**

**Nationality: South Korean**

**Religion: N/A**

**City or town of birth: Seoul, South Korea**

**Currently lives: Seoul, South Korea**

**Languages spoken: Korean, English, Chinese, Japanese**

**Native language: Korean**

**Relationship Status: It’s complicated**

**=========================================**

**PHYSICAL APPEARANCE**

**=========================================**

**Height: 5’9 (175 cm)**

**Weight: 139 lbs (63 kg)**

**Figure/build: Fine built**

**Hair colour: Dark Brown (BLACK NATURALLY**

**Hairstyle: Short**

**Eye colour: Brown**

**Skin colour: Fair**

**Tattoos: N/A**

**Piercings: Earlobe piercings**

**Scars/distinguishing marks: N/A**

**Preferred style of clothing: Casual**

**Frequently worn jewellery/accessories: Glasses, contact lenses**

**=========================================**

**HEALTH**

**=========================================**

**Smoker? No**

**Drinker? No**

**Recreational Drug User? Which? No**

**Addictions: N/A**

**Allergies: N/A**

**Any physical ailments/illnesses/disabilities: No**

**Any medication regularly taken: No**

**=========================================**

**PERSONALITY**

**=========================================**

**Personality: Caring, Sweet, Funny, Sensible, Inspiring**

**Likes: Helping out others**

**Dislikes: Being stressed out**

**Fears/phobias: N/A**

**Favourite colour: Blue**

**Hobbies: Singing, dancing, reading, cooking**

**Taste in music: Rock**

**=========================================**

**SKILLS**

**=========================================**

**Talents/skills: Singing, Dancing, Cooking**

**Ability to drive a car? Operate any other vehicles? Drives a car**

**=========================================**

**EATING HABITS**

**=========================================**

**Omnivore/Carnivore/Herbivore (Vegetarian): Omnivore**

**Favourite food(s): Chicken**

**Favourite drink(s): Peach water**

**Disliked food(s): Fresh Fish**

**Disliked drink(s): N/A**

**=========================================**

**HOUSE AND HOME**

**=========================================**

**Describe the character's house/home: His house is a one story, two bedroom home, with colorful walls, and nice decor**

**Do they share their home with anyone? Who? He shares the house with his girlfriend / ex girlfriend Karin Lee.**

**Significant/special belongings: A painting his mom had given him when he had moved out of his parents' house.**

**=========================================**

**CAREER**

**=========================================**

**Level of education: College Sophomore**

**Qualifications: Bachelor's degree**

**Current job title: Works in his college library**

**=========================================**

**FAMILY, FRIENDS AND FOES**

**=========================================**

**Parents names:**   
****

**Yoo Minhyun (Father)**

**Yoo Harin (Mother)**

**Are parents alive or dead?**

**Father is still alive but his mother died when just recently**

**Is the character still in contact with their parents?**

**He’s still in contact with his father.**

**Best Friend: Min Yoongi**

**Acquaintances: Jasey Ryan Kim**

**=========================================**

**BACKSTORY**

**=========================================**

**Describe their childhood (newborn - age 10):**

**Newborn: 1:00 Am, November 22nd, 2001, Yoo Kihyun was born**   
****

**Age 5: met best friend Min Yoongi  
Age 8: met friend Maeve lee  
Age 9: met Karin lee  
Age 10: Lost friend Maeve lee to suicide (THIS IS SET IN A DIFFERENT TIME FROM NO SURPRISE)**

**Describe their teenage years (11 - 19):  
** **Age 13: started dating Karin  
** **Age 16: got his ears piercing  
** **Age 17: graduated high school  
** **Age 18: Moved out of his parents house  
** **Started college  
** **Moved in with Karin Lee  
** **Age 19: Mom passes away  
** **Breaks up with Karin Lee  
** **Meets Jasey Ryan Kim  
** **TBC**


	3. ρℓαуℓιѕт

****

**PLAYLIST:**

**1: 3am: HALSEY**

**"I keep on hanging on the line. Ignoring every warning sign. Come on and make me feel alright again."**

**2: I HATE EVERYBODY: HALSEY**

**"And really I could fall in love with anybody. Who don't want me, so I just keep saying. I hate everybody."**

**3: you should be sad: HALSEY**

**"Just glad I made it out without breaking down."**

**4: NIGHTMARE: HALSEY**

**"I could play nice, or I could be a bully. I'm tired and angry, but somebody should be."**

**5: HOPELESS: HALSEY**

**"'Cause you know the truth hurts but secrets kill."**

**6: LIE: HALSEY**

**"'Cause I'm tryna' give the impression that I get the message you wish I was dead."**

**7: WALLS COULD TALK: HALSEY**

**"Now you gon' play me like a violin. Hittin' these no-notes."**

**8: Eyes Closed: HALSEY**

**"Would've gave it all for you, cared for you. So tell me where I went wrong. Would've gave it all for you, cared for you. (My lover, my liar)."**

**9: Angel On Fire: HALSEY**

**"And nobody seems to recognize me in the crowd in the background screamin', "everybody, look at me!""**

**10: Young God: HALSEY**

**"He says, "Oh, baby girl, don't get cut on my edges, I'm the king of everything and oh, my tongue is a weapon. There's a light in the crack that's separating your thighs, and if you wanna go to heaven you should fuck me tonight.""**

**11: Sorry: HALSEY**

**"Someone will love you. But someone isn't me."**

**12: Forever... (is such a long time): HALSEY**

**"What am I thinking? What does this mean? How could somebody ever love me?"** **  
**

**13: Strangers: HALSEY**

**"I miss the memories replaying in my head. I miss the thought of a forever, you and me."**

**14: I'm Not Mad: HALSEY**

**"I'm not even mad anymore."**

**15: Finally // beautiful stranger: HALSEY**

**"Beautiful stranger, here you are in my arms."**

**16: Still Learning: HALSEY**

**"I know that I love you but I'm still learning to love myself."**

**17: ALONE: HALSEY**

**"I'm still alone in my mind."**

**18: DOMINIC'S INTERLUDE: HALSEY**

**"Your eyes are fragile and timeless."**

**19: SUGA'S INTERLUDE: HALSEY**

**"Your convictions, efforts, faith, and greeds. It is not of ugliness, I believe it."**

**20: 929: HALSEY**

**"And it's just these things that I'm thinking for hours."**


	4. 1: 3åm

****

****

****

**LOCKSCREEN**

****

**WALLPAPER**

**1: 3åm**

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

**Ugh, why do I have to be so reckless, like this? I’ve literally just left the bar, at like 3am. Ugh, I’m so stupid, and my parents are gonna kill me. But, it’s not like I care, hell my parents are asleep at like 12. It was technically Changkyun’s fault, because he’s the one who got the fake Ids, and he’s the one who said we should drink, till we were piss face drunk. The others had left about 20 minutes before me, and I just sat at the bar continuing to drink, until the bartender had cut me off, which made me sad. I stumble back and forth a little, and I sighed, the only reason, I’m out here tonight, was, 1 to drink my sorrows away, and 2 I’m going to end it today. I decided it was best to end it today, and right now, because I’m drunk, so I can’t pussyfoot out, like I do all the fucking time. As I felt the tears roll down my face, I went over to the bridge, but me being drunk as shit, I had bumped into someone, and that caused me to fall on my ass, and I whined… come on, this person is ruining my chance of being free.**

**“Oh my god, are you okay?” I hear that person ask but that voice was so muffled that it was barely recognizable. I pout and I look up at the person and through the darkness (except the street lights that were illuminating in the background), I could see the person in front of me, and he was gorgeous. He had this dark brown hair, these round glasses, this worried look on his face, and I saw he was wearing a big hoodie, some skinny jeans, and combat boots, which made him ten times more hotter. I get up - well stumble up and I stumbled my way over to him “Are you drunk?” The boy asked me, and I smiled and giggled at his beautiful voice**

**“Noooo.” I giggled and I went to stumble away, but the boy grabbed my arm and I look back over at him**

**“I’ll take you back to my place, before you get yourself hurt.” He told me, and he had picked me off the ground, and then all of a sudden I was on his back, and I pouted… my only chance… wasted away. As the boy was walking, I felt my eyes get heavy, and I placed my head on his shoulder and fell asleep.**

_**Kihyun’s P.O.V** _

_**Who is this girl? Why is she out at 3am drinking on a Thursday night? She looks like she’s in high school. Ugh, great, how am I supposed to explain this to her parents? Wait, what if she doesn’t have any parents - wait no don’t come to that conclusion Kihyun, you don’t even know this girl.** _

_**\---** _

_**I made it to my house, and I look over at the girl and she was asleep… great. I just hope to god, Karin isn’t here. We had the biggest fight in the whole world, where she had just up and left, telling me that she’s not gonna come back… it’s been like this for a year now. It stopped for a while when my mom had died, but when I felt better, we started fighting again. I placed the girl on my girlfriend’s/ex girlfriend’s bed, and I heard a buzz, it’s probably her phone. I saw her shorts pocket lit up, her phone is in her pocket. I pull her phone out of her pocket, and I saw she had a text** _

_**‘Kyunnie: Hey JaseyBear sorry for leaving so early, I’m kinda wasted right now haha, sosz but anyway hope you get home safe. Love you girlyy!!’** _

_**Jasey? Her name is Jasey? I saw her lockscreen was these three guys… probably her friends… they got drunk with her? Sheesh, I bet these guys are in high school. I turned off her phone, and I placed it on the side table, and I tucked her in. I went and got her some medicine and some water, for her to take when she wakes up. I went over to my bedroom, and I climb into my bed, not even bothering to change out of my clothes.** _

**\---**

***7:00 A.M.***

**I wake up to this pounding headache, and I look over at my surroundings, and nothing looked familiar… at all. Oh my god, did I get kidnapped, drunk?! I look around and I see a glass of water and some medicine… hmm at least my kidnapper is thoughtful. I take the medicine, and I saw a note and I picked it up and it said ‘You weren’t kidnapped, I just wanted to get you somewhere safe, before you were actually kidnapped. - YKH’ ‘YKH?’ I thought, who is that? I saw my phone and I turned it on and I saw there was a text from Changkyun, Hoseok, Hyunwoo, Jooheon, and Minhyuk. I then look at the time and it said 7:00 Am. “Shit!” I yell and I get out of the bed and that caused someone to run in the room, and I recognize that face. That beautiful face. He’s the reason why I couldn’t end it last night.**

**“What’s wrong?” He asked me and that voice… was still beautiful sober, as it was drunk.**

**“I’m late for school.” I say to him and I put my shoes on, and I went to leave his house, but then I feel my arm being pulled**

**“I could take you.” The person told me and I shook my head**

**“I don’t know you.” I tell him**

**“I’m Yoo Kihyun.” He told me and I sighed, and I opened my phone and I sighed again, and I went over to my texts**

**‘JaseyBear: Kyunnie bring my bag with you on the way to school!’ I text Changkyun, because I was hanging out with Changkyun after school yesterday, and I forgot I left my bag over at his house. Knowing that Changkyun doesn’t leave his house until 7:10, I know he’s still there.**

**‘Kyunnie: On it!’ He texted back, and I put my phone back in my pocket and I then realize I’m in the same clothes from yesterday… great. I have no time to have a wardrobe change, I’m just gonna have to deal with it.**

**“Alright, take me to my school.” I say to Kihyun and he nodded**

**“Do you go to, Jacobs High?” Kihyun asked me and I nodded, confused. Isn’t he in school? Isn’t he 17?**

**“Perfect, I went there when I was in school.” Kihyun told me with a smile, and he began walking out of the room, and probably out of the house, and what he had said, just left me speechless. How old is he? I was pulled out of my thoughts, and I ran after him**

**“Hey, how old are you?” I ask him as I get inside his car**

**“19. What about you?” He answered back with a question, and I widened my eyes**

**“17.” I tell him and he nodded and he started the car and began to drive me to my school… Holy shit, a college student kidnapped me!**

**\---**

**I see Changkyun waiting for me at the steps of the school, Kihyun had stopped his car and I got out of the car, and I feel my hand being grabbed and I looked over at him “What?” I ask him**

**“Make sure to check your phone when you get the chance.” Kihyun told me and I was confused but I nodded and he then took off and I was shocked. I then opened my phone and I went to my contacts and I saw there was this contact named ‘Kiki’. What the fuck! He just added his number into my phone?! Dickbag!**

**“Ooh, Jaseybear, who was that?” Changkyun asked me as he gave me my bag “Did you go home with him?” Changkyun asked another question**

**“No, dummy. I must’ve ran into him, when I was wasted, and he took me home.” I say and we began walking and Changkyun laughed**

**“Wahhh, that’s hilarious, but I’m glad you were safe.” Changkyun told me and I glare at him**

**“You five fucktards were the ones who left me at the bar in the first place, so it’s your fault that a 19 year old picked me up from the street, and put his number into my phone.” I told Changkyun mad and he began to laugh loudly**

**“He put his number in your phone?!” He exclaimed as he was laughing and I hit him on the back of the head and he winced “Jeez, Jas, that still hurts you know.” He told me with a pout on his face and I smile sarcastically and I saw my other friends, Jooheon, Hoseok, Minhyuk, Hyunwoo, and Hyungwon standing by Jooheon’s locker**

**“Oh my god, Jazzy is alive!” Jooheon exclaimed and I winced from the loud noise**

**“Honey, I have a raging headache.” I say to Jooheon and he frowned and wrapped his arm around me**

**“Sorry, Jazzy.” Jooheon apologized and I smiled**

**“Oh my god, guys, we have some big ass news to share about our little JaseyBear.” Changkyun says and I groaned and the other 4 boys looked at him**

**“What is it?” Hyungwon asked yawning and then the bell had rung and we all groaned from the loud noise**

**“I’ll tell you guys at lunch.” Changkyun says and we all part ways to go to our designated classes. But the whole time, I was walking over to my class, I couldn’t stop thinking about that guy… Kihyun. What the hell is wrong with me?**

**A/N**

**Here’s chapter 1 of my new story!!**

**Alright, I know I’m supposed to be working on ‘No Surprise’ but Halsey had her new album come out, and the song 3am gave me an idea… sooo sorry haha!!**

**This story will include: angst, Fluff, Depression, Anxiety, Suicide Attempts - y’know the whole shebang !!**

**DON’T BE A SILENT READER, SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS!!**

**[RAELEE]**


	5. 2: £ðllðwïñg ¥ðµ

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**2: £ðllðwïñg ¥ðµ**

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

**I walk into the cafeteria with Changkyun, and we got our food, and we went to our usual table and I sat down with a sigh “So… tell us what happened.” Jooheon told me and I sighed and nodded**

**“Alright, after you guys left the bar, I was stumbling out, and I bumped into this guy, and being completely wasted, I remember how good looking he was, and he took me to his house, and put his number into my phone.” I tell them and they widened their eyes**

**“What?!” Hoseok yelled and I wince from the noise, then I hear my phone buzz and I grabbed it and I saw someone liked my Instagram post and they put a comment on it**

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***3,000 hearts***

**JaseyBearrrr: God I love my best friend, he’s just the best**   
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**PIC CREDIT: @SUNSHINEHYUKIE**

**Comments: @HamsterHyun: Wow so pretty!!**

**“What the hell!” I exclaimed and they looked confused**

**“What’s wrong?” Hyungwon asked me**

**“The guy followed me on Instagram.” I say and Changkyun started laughing**

**“Click on his profile, I wanna see what he looks like.” Jooheon told me and I was taken aback**

**“Jooheon, he’s not gay.” I say to him and he rolled his eyes**

**“Not for me, for you!!” He exclaimed and I rolled my eyes and I clicked on his profile and I went over to his most recent picture**

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***10,000 Hearts***

**HamsterHyun: She just had to leave did she?**

*** _COMMENTS ARE DISABLED FOR THIS POST_ ***

**“Wow, Jasey, you did good.” Minhyuk told me as he took a sip from his water bottle and I rolled my eyes**

**“Oh my god, Jasey, look at this one.” Jooheon told me and I sighed and I went to the picture Jooheon was talking about** ****

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***DON’T MIND THE KIHYUN SELCA TIME & THE VLIVE LOGO***

***13,000 Hearts***

**HamsterHyun: I’m logging off for a while, just not feeling good**

**“He’s good looking.” Hoseok told me and Hyungwon looked over at him with this glare and I sighed**

**“He probably has a girlfriend, and besides I just met the dude.” I tell him**

**“Yeah, and he put his number in your phone.” Hyunwoo told me and I sighed, I literally don’t know the purpose in this world, I mean why would anyone fall in love with me? I was in a relationship and the fucker cheated on me, so now I feel like I shouldn’t even be in one.**

**“You never know until you try Jasey.” Jooheon told me and I looked down at the post, and I turned off my phone and I turn my attention over to my food and I began to eat.**

**\---**

**I walk inside my house, to see my baby brother, Jimin, waddle over to me and I pick him up and I hugged him “You didn’t come home last night.” My step dad, Jinyoung told me and I sighed**

**“I stayed over at Changkyun’s, remember?” I ask him and he sighed**

**“I told you to you can hang out with him, not stay over at his house.” Jinyoung told me and I rolled my eyes and I put Jimin back on the ground**

**“You don’t get to tell me who I can stay over with. You’re not my father.” I say and I pushed past him, walking past my mother and my brothers. It’s hard being the only girl, with 4 other brothers, they all treat me different, and I’m sick of it. I went into my room, and I lay face flat on my bed. I hear footsteps pad up to me, and I looked over to see my dog Rose and I smiled and I patted the top of my bed and she jumped on the bed, and began licking me in the face, and I laughed. I just wish I could run away, and forget everything, but I need to be alive for my friends.**

**\---**

***Next Day***

**Ugh, thank god today is Saturday, I honestly can’t deal with school today! I was walking while the sun setting, and my earbuds were in my ears, playing a random rock song, that I don’t even know the name of, but it sounds good. I make my way over to the bridge, and I lean my arms on it, so I could watch the sun set. I feel myself being tapped and I look over to see Kihyun, and I sighed “What do you want?” I ask him and he was taken aback**

**“Is that anyway to treat your kidnapper?” Kihyun asked me, taking it as a joke**

**“Oh yes, I’m getting stockholm syndrome.” I say sarcastically and he laughed and that made me smile softly from how cute his laugh was**

**“Oh, is that a smile?” Kihyun asked and I immediately took the smile off of my face, “Why did you do that? I like the smile.” Kihyun told me and I was confused… we just met like 2 days ago. “Smile for me.” He told me and I shook my head and he pouted and to be honest it was pretty damn cute, that I had to smile. And that made him cheer “Yay!!” He cheered and I smiled again**

**“You’re weird.” I say to him and I look at him and he was just staring at me, and that creeped me out a little, for him to just to stare at him**

**“Whoa, I’ve never seen two different color eyes before.” Kihyun says mesmerized, and I chuckled**

**“You’ve never seen people put two different colored contact lenses in their eyes?” I ask him and he shook his head and I sighed “How did you find my Instagram?” I ask him after there was a couple seconds of silence**

**“It’s not hard to find people who have the same name spelling as you.” He told me and I sighed and chuckled “Would you like to hang out sometime?” Kihyun asked me and I widened my eyes**

**“Umm, don’t you have college to go to?” I ask him and he thought about it and he sighed**

**“Alright, we can hang out next weekend then.” Kihyun says and I laugh, this boy is so persuasive, it makes me giggle.**

**“Alright.” I tell him and by the time we spent talking, the sun had already set and it was completely dark outside, “I’m gonna go, I need to get home.” I say to Kihyun and he nodded and we went our separate ways, and I felt my chest get tight a little bit, and I grabbed my box of cigarettes from my pocket, and I lit one, to relieve my stress and anxiety, why is hanging out with someone that is not my friends, bringing out my anxiety, god I’m so pathetic.**

**A/N**

**Here’s chapter 2!!!**

**The Instagram bits aren’t gonna be in the story that much, just wanted to use it for fun!!**

**But yeah anyway I’m loving this story so far, and I hope you guys are too!!**

**DON’T BE A SILENT READER, SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS!!**

**[RAELEE]**


	6. 3: ÚñÐêrê§†ïmå†êÐ

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**3: ÚñÐêrê§†ïmå†êÐ**

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

***NEXT WEEK***

**I sit on the bench, just smoking a cig, waiting for the slowpoke, Yoo Kihyun. He literally told me he was gonna be here at noon, and it’s like 1:30. I then see a messy head, Kihyun in my peripheral vision, and I put out the cigarette as fast as I could before he saw it. “Sorry, I’m so late, I lost track of time.” Kihyun says to me and I look at him and his hair was wet and messy and I chuckled**

**“Nice hair, bro.” I told him and he ran his hand through his messy hair and he sighed**

**“You look like you just got out of bed.” Kihyun told me and I laughed**

**“It’s because I did.” I say to him and I put my hood up, “The late up all night, watching Netflix kicked in.” I tell him, as I stood up, I stayed up all night watching Sex Education on Netflix, and that ending really made me mad, I can’t comprehend it**

**“Oh really? What show?” Kihyun asked me as we started walking, and I tense up and widened my eyes and I look at him**

**“Uhhhh… nothing pure for you.” I say to him and he rolled his eyes**

**“Alright.” Kihyun says to me and I laughed**

**\---**

***Timeskip: 2 hours later***

**I sat my phone down on a bench, as my shoes became untied, I really don’t know how they did, but they did. Once I looked up, I see Kihyun has my phone, and I rolled my eyes “Are you serious?” I ask him and he looked at me**

**“What? I just wanted to post this to your Instagram.” Kihyun told me and he showed me the picture that he was posting to my Instagram** ****

***5,000 hearts***

**JaseyBearrrr: Look who got hacked!! HAHA sorry!!**   
****

**@HamsterHyun**

**Comments: @Honeybee: OMG JASEY!!! WTFFFF!!  
@Sleepwon: Oopppp Jasey’s on a date  
@IAMWHATIAM: Omg JaseyBear you’re on a date with this man?!  
@MuscleBunny: Omg he’s cute, Jasey, send him over to me   
@PapaBear: I never knew Jasey would actually go on a date with him  
@SunshineHyukie: oh Jasey, Jooheon is gonna kill you**

**“Great, now my friends think we’re dating.” I say to him and he smiled**

**“I could always just tell them, I’m in a relationship.” Kihyun told me and I felt my heart just crack… he has a girlfriend? Of course he does, Jasey. He’s a real good looking guy, who you just met, like last week.**

**“You’re in a relationship?” I ask him and he sighed and looked down at the ground**

**“It’s complicated.” Kihyun told me and I was confused on what he meant, but I just dropped it, because I don’t want him to like hate me, because you know that would suck.**

**“You want to do anything? Or you just want to talk?” I ask him and he shrugged**

**“I guess talk, I mean, this is why I asked you to hang out, right?” He asked and I laughed and nodded**

**“I mean, I guess.” I tell him**

**“Okay first things first, I wanna ask how you got that scar on your forehead.” Kihyun told me and I laughed, everyone always wants to know how I got this ugly ass scar on my head**

**“Umm, so well I was playing with my older brothers, and my brother threw something at me, and I fell split my head open on the coffee table.” I tell Kihyun and he cringed at the story and I laughed, “It hurt like hell, but I guess I'm gonna have to live with this ugly thing on my head.” I continued**

**“How did you not end up with a concussion?” Kihyun asked me and I shrugged**

**“I think I did have a concussion, but just a small one. They stitched my head up, and off I was, and had to stay up incase there was a concussion. I don’t remember if there was one, I don’t know. I was 10 years old when it happened.” I say to him**

**“Jesus.” Kihyun grimaced and I smiled, “I was also going through your Instagram, you know like friends do, I’m sorry if you think this is stalking, but I saw this guy, who I’ve never seen in your newest posts.” Kihyun says and I frowned and tensed up… shit he found the picture I posted about Jungkook… Jesus save me**

**“Ummm, that’s my ex boyfriend, Jungkook.” I tell him and he widened his eyes**

**“Whoa, what happened?” Kihyun asked and I looked over at him “If you mind telling me.” He continued and I sighed and shrugged**

**“Fucker cheated on me.” I tell him, “I was always underestimated by him and his friends, but it is what is, we’re only together for a year. Then I met Changkyun and the rest and I’ve never felt as happy as I am.”I say to him, but the last part was kind of a lie, because I’m not happy with myself, or just happy at all… my self esteem sucks.**

**“Why were you out at 3am last week?” Kihyun asked as we were walking in the three minutes of silence and I sighed, he can’t know why I was really out there, he’ll just think I’m crazy.**

**“Uh well, Changkyun and my friends - minus Hyungwon, because he was too busy sleeping - we went out drinking, because we just had a really big test that was really difficult, and we just wanted to have the edge be taken off, but I didn’t expect to be drinking until I was wasted.” I tell him**

**“You’re lucky, that I was here, and not a pervert.” Kihyun told me and I look at him**

**“Who says you’re not a pervert? I mean, I don’t even know you. Except your name and age, but who knows that could be just fake.” I tell him and he laughed**

**“Okay, then. I’m Yoo Kihyun, age 19 born in November in Seoul, I like chicken and peach water, and I love to nag people. There good enough?” Kihyun says and I laughed**

**“Great, now I know your favorite food and drink.” I say to him as I linked my arm with his and he looked at me shocked, and I then unlink my arm from his… well that is awkward “S-sorry.” I stutter, looking at the ground and he shook his head**

**“No worries, it’s just that I didn’t expect it.” He told me and I nodded, still looking down at the ground. Then all of a sudden my phone started to ring, and I saw the contact ID and it said ‘Mother whom I love’ and I answered**

**“Hello?” I answer**

**‘Hey, Jasey, can you come home, we need your help with stuff.’ Mom told me and I sighed**

**“Why can’t you have the idiots help you?” I ask, talking about my brothers**

**‘Just come home, alright?’ She asked and I rolled my eyes, and I hung up my phone and I look over at Kihyun and I sighed**

**“I’m going to have to go home.” I tell him and he nodded slightly “Sorry, to have it end so suddenly.” I apologized and he shook his head**

**“It’s alright. If you want to find me on the weekdays, I’m working at the college library.” Kihyun told me and he pulled out his phone and he did something, and then my phone went off, and I look down to see an address... probably for the school. I smiled and looked back at him**

**“I’ll see you later.” I told him and he nodded and I began to walk away from him, with a smile plastered on my face, and it was so big that nothing can make this smile fall off my face… I mean nothing.**

**A/N**

**Here’s chapter 3!!!**

**Hmmm I feel like Jasey and Kihyun are just really cute, what do you guys think?**

**DON’T BE A SILENT READER, SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS!!!**

**[RAELEE]**


	7. 4: Ìñ§ê¢µrê

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**4: Ìñ§ê¢µrê**

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

**I was leaning against my locker just looking at Jungkook and his new girlfriend, and I sighed… he gets a new girlfriend like every couple of months, and I feel so bad for the girls he dates. He’s dated like maybe 10 girls in the past two years since we broke up… wait I don’t know why this is bothering me, I guess, I just hate cheaters. “Yikes…” I hear a voice say and I look over to see Changkyun standing behind me, knowing that Jungkook was kissing this girl and I sighed and shook my head**

**“I don’t care, that he’s in a relationship, Changkyun, the asshole cheated on me.” I tell him, “I just care about that poor girl, who’s heart is going to break because of him.” I continued, and he sighed**

**“You used to be so insecure, knowing that he was in another relationship, after you two broke up.” He told me and I sighed and shook my head**

**“Yeah, well, that’s over.” I say to him, which is kind of a lie, but it’s the only thing to get him off my back.**

**\---**

**I was sitting in my bedroom, doing my English homework, then I hear my phone go off, and I grabbed it and I saw a notification about my Instagram, and I knew Kihyun had liked my post and he commented on it as well, oh boy this post is kind of depressing.**

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***9,000 Hearts***

**JaseyBearrrr: Somehow I just want you More**

**Comments: @Honeybee: Jeez Jazzy what’s with the depression?  
** **@Sleepwon: Did you just quote something?  
** **@IAMWHATIAM: Want who? Who do you want, Jasey?  
** **@MuscleBunny: You’re so aesthetic, Jas, it’s unfair  
** **@SunshineHyukie: You still have wires? Ever heard of airpods?  
** **@HamsterHyun: Do you want to talk about it?**

**Minhyuk’s comment had me laugh, because he knows that I will never get airpods, even if someone had a gun to my head forcing me to get them, but Kihyun’s comment made my heart swell up, I don’t know why, I mean he has a girlfriend… ugh this is making feel even more insecure, I don’t know why.**

**\---**

***Next Day***

**I was walking through the school halls, having everyone stares at me, because I had my sunglasses on my head, so my scar is showing, and everyone always bullied me about my scar, I don’t know why, I mean it’s just a scar, but I get insecure about the smallest things about myself. I then see Jungkook walk up to me and I tense up… shit! “Hey, Jasey.” Jungkook greeted and I look down at the ground, “You’re looking pretty hot today.” Jungkook says and I looked up at him with this shocked look on my face**

**“We’re not even together anymore, Jungkook, we haven’t been in the last two years.” I tell him, thinking he is insane, and what kind of nerve he has to say that to me, the person who he cheated on.**

**“Who cares, we were our first relationships, so why not just try it again.” Jungkook says putting his hands on my waist, and I push him back**

**“What the hell is wrong with you?” I ask him feeling tears well up in my eyes**

**“Come on, don’t be such a little bitch.” Jungkook snapped, then I feel an arm wrap around me, and I knew it was Changkyun**

**“Walk away Jungkook, before it gets ugly.” Hoseok told Jungkook, and Jungkook scoffed**

**“Whatever, she’s a slut anyway. I’ve seen her Instagram post about that guy. Jasey, he’s just going to hurt you too. Check that guys Instagram, when you get the chance.” Jungkook said and he walked off, and Hoseok, and Hyungwon looked over at me and I sighed**

**“You okay?” Changkyun asked me in a small voice and I sighed**

**“Yeah, let’s just go.” I told them and we began to walk off, and I had this pit in my stomach, and it was just going to continue to grow… ugh I should’ve just ended it that day.**

**\---**

**I went over to Kihyun’s house, as I remember the address for it last week, I don’t know how I did, I just did. I went over to talk to him, because I need to get my mind off what Jungkook had said to me at school today, and Kihyun has nice words to say. I place a few knocks on the door, and the door swung open, and I see Kihyun with wet and messy hair. I was confused on why his hair is wet and messy “Why is your hair wet?” I ask him and he sighed**

**“I just had a shower.” Kihyun told me and I nodded,**

**“Well can I come in?” I ask him and he sighed**

**“Umm, Jasey, my girlfriend’s here.” Kihyun told me and I widen my eyes, his girlfriend?**

**“Oh ummm, I’ll come back later.” I say**

**“No, wait-” He started but I shook my head**

**“No, I won’t bother you and her.” I tell him and I walked off, leaving him shocked… his girlfriend is there? Ughh, Kihyun said it was complicated, meaning they were broken up, but I guess it was not taken up like that. Ugh, I’m an idiot.**

**\---**

**I sit down on a bench and I opened up my phone and I went over to Instagram, and I went over to Kihyun’s latest post, and it almost made me want to cry… ugh I’m pathetic, I’m so stupid! God!!!**

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***20,000 Hearts***

**HamsterHyun: Look who’s back? My love  
** **@KarenLee**

**Comments: @KarenLee: Love you Kihyunnie!**

**I knew I never had a chance with him. He’s an adult, while I’m just a stupid child. I felt the tears roll down my face, and I groaned. Why the hell am I crying? I just met him like 2 weeks ago! I guess I felt something, but he probably didn’t feel the same feeling I felt. Whatever. We could just continue to be friends. It’s not really any of my intentions of being in a relationship. This is good. I don’t want to be a person that Kihyun cheats on with. I was cheated on so I would know what that would feel like, and I won’t do that to someone. I could just continue to be myself, and still be friends with him. This will be easy. I hope.**

**A/N**

**Here’s chapter 4!!!**

**Okay no more Instagram bits for a few chapters**

**But Jasey found about Kihyun’s girlfriend… oop**

**But don’t worry their relationship will continue to grow!!**

**Jungkook actually plays a big part in this story, and we will see Kihyun’s POV next chapter!!**

**DON’T BE A SILENT READER, SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS!!!**

**[RAELEE]**


	8. 5: Älðñê

**5: Älðñê**

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

**I was lying on my bed, just playing some music on my stereo, loud. It’s a good thing that my parents and brothers weren’t here, because they went somewhere on vacation for the weekend, without taking me - well I mean they tried, but I just wanted to stay at home. I’m going to be so happy when I move out of my house, because I can’t stand to be here anymore! Ugh, I can’t just sit here. I turn off the stereo and I jump from my bed and I began to make my way out of the house, walking down near the bridge with a cigarette between my lips.**

**\---**

**_Kihyun’s P.O.V_ **

**_I was making my way out with Karen… yeah she finally came back and we got back together, but the look on Jasey’s face when I told her that Karen was there at my house with me, kinda hurt me, because the way her face just fell, it looked like she came over to my house to tell me something, but I probably just made her feel worse… ugh Kihyun, why are you thinking about this, I mean you have your girlfriend right here next to you. I see this girl walking ahead of us, with a cigarette between her lips… I then realize it was Jasey. Whoa - wait, Jasey, smokes? “Jasey?” I call out and she jumped and looked over to me and Karen and she threw her cigarette down and put it out_ **

**_“H-hey, Kihyun.” She greeted with a stutter and I look over at Karen and she was just so confused_ **

**_“Oh uh, Jasey, this is my girlfriend, Karen, and Karen this is my friend Jasey.” I said introducing those two_ **

**_“Hi.” Karen greeted and Jasey just waved “Um, Kihyun, I’m going to go and buy some stuff, I’ll meet you back home, alright?” Karen says and I looked over and nodded_ **

**_“I’m going to be meeting Yoongi, later today, so I’ll see you at 8.” I tell her and she nods and she gives me a kiss goodbye and walked off, leaving me and Jasey alone together. I look over at her and I just stared at her_ **

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

***A couple of seconds before***

**I blew a puff of smoke out, as I had continued walking down the bridge, feeling that cool breeze blowing, making my hair fly everywhere. “Jasey?” I jump when I hear my name being called, and that voice was familiar, and I widened my eyes… is that Kihyun? I turn around and just my luck it was Kihyun… and his girlfriend. SHIT!! I took the cigarette out from my lips and I threw it on the ground, stomping on it so it can be put out… great! “H-hey, Kihyun.” I greet with a stutter… great, you dumbass**

**“Oh uh, Jasey, this is my girlfriend, Karen, and Karen this is my friend Jasey.” Kihyun says introducing me to his girlfriend and vice versa**

**“Hi.” Karen greeted but I had just waved, awkwardly… this is just awkward! “Um, Kihyun, I’m going to go and buy some stuff, I’ll meet you back home, alright?” Karen says to Kihyun and he had looked over at her, and had nodded**

**“I’m going to be meeting Yoongi, later today, so I’ll see you at 8.” Kihyun told her and she nodded and she kissed him goodbye, and she continued to make her way, leaving me and Kihyun alone. When I looked over, Kihyun’s way, I saw he was staring at me, and he had this faint very teensy tiny smile on his face**

**“Why are you staring at me?” I ask him**

**“Just appreciating what’s in front of me.” Kihyun muttered and I widened my eyes and he began walking away as well, leaving me alone and I was just shocked about what he just said… what the hell was that? I felt my chest get tight, my breathing start to go uneven, my hands start to tremble, and I had to grab the edges of the bridge to calm myself, and I sink down to the ground, letting my butt hit the solid ground, and I grabbed my bottle of medication, and I dry mouth a couple of pills, and I sighed in content, as I feel myself get back to normal.**

**\---**

**_Kihyun’s P.O.V_ **

**_“Yoongi, I think I’ve got a problem.” I say to my best friend, Min Yoongi, as I walked in the bar, and he stopped cleaning the bar and looked over at me and snorted_ **

**_“Well that’s an understatement, you’re dating a shitty person.” Yoongi told me and I glared at him, Yoongi has never been a fan of Karen, I mean, we meet her a year after we met Maeve, and Maeve didn’t like her, and when Maeve killed herself, Yoongi still didn’t like her, but when I started dating her at the tail end of the 8th grade, his hatred for her just grew._ **

**_“Not that, Yoongi, I met someone.” I tell him and he widened his eyes_ **

**_“Ooh, is Mr. Loverboy Yoo Kihyun, cheating on the “love of his life”?” He asked using air quotes for, love of his life, and I rolled my eyes_ **

**_“Oh my god, Yoongi, can you be serious for once?” I ask_ **

**_“I’m Min Yoongi, what part of me is serious?” He asked and I sighed_ **

**_“I knew you would be no help.” I say and I was about to leave the bar, and he sighed_ **

**_“Wait, dumbass, talk.” Yoongi told me, stopping me from walking out of the bar, and I walked back over to him and I sat down on a bar stool_ **

**_“So, like I said, I met someone, and she’s really pretty, but she’s just a friend, and I really don’t know what to do.” I tell Yoongi_ **

**_“Okay… what’s her name, genius?” Yoongi asked and I sighed_ **

**_“Jasey.” I say and he sighs_ **

**_“Hmm, when did you meet her?” Yoongi asked_ **

**_“The day Karen left, and I was out just walking at 3am to clear my head, I saw her, and she was wasted, and I thought it would be a good idea to bring her back to my place, before somebody hurt her, and yeah, we’ve been friends ever since. There’s nothing much.” I tell him_ **

**_“Well is she a college student like us?” Yoongi asked and I shook my head_ **

**_“She’s 17.” I tell him and Yoongi hit me on the head_ **

**_“Are you insane? She’s still in high school!” He exclaimed and I rolled my eyes_ **

**_“It’s only two years apart, you big child.” I tell him, “But, I also know some things about her.” I continued and he nodded signalling me to go on, and I sighed, “Well, she drinks… of course, she has two different colored eyes, a scar on her head when she split it open, and she smokes - which I just found out today.” I tell him_ **

**_“This girl, sounds like she’s got a lot of home problems.” Yoongi told me and I wondered what was wrong with her._ **

**\---**

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

**“What happened when you were out there, Jaseybear?” Changkyun asked me as I had my head on his chest, and I sighed**

**“I met his girlfriend.” I say to Changkyun and he looked down at me**

**“He has a girlfriend?” He asked and I nodded, “Do you feel something for him?” Changkyun asked me and I sighed and shrugged**

**“I don’t know. Maybe. But, he’s in a relationship, and I don’t want to be the person who he’s cheating on his girlfriend with, I was cheated on, so I know how that feels, Changkyun. I mean I like him, but I don’t know if I have those feelings for him.” I tell him and it was true, I don’t know if I even have feelings for Kihyun, like Changkyun thinks I do. I felt something when I met him, but I don’t know. This is all too much for me.**

**A/N**

**Here’s chapter 5!!**

**Jasey met Kihyun’s girlfriend oooh!!**

**Yoongi was introduced in this chapter yay!!**

**DON’T BE A SILENT READER, SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS!!!**

**[RAELEE]**


	9. 6: Öðþ§

**6: Öðþ§**

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

***1 week later***

**“I’m not doing it, Kihyun.” I say to him with my arms crossed and he groaned**

**“Why not?” He whined**

**“Because I don’t like coffee.” I say to him and he was confused and shocked**

**“Everyone likes coffee, especially Starbucks!” Kihyun exclaimed and I laughed and shook my head**

**“Yeah, Hyungwon does, but not me. I despise it.” I say to him and he sighed**

**“Just one taste, please~~” Kihyun begged and I sighed and I nodded and I grabbed it and I took a drink and I scrunch my face up in disgust, and I gave it back to Kihyun**

**“Gross.” I say and he laughed**

**“You want to go out and eat something, I mean I know this really good ice cream place.” Kihyun says and I smiled and nodded, and he smiled as well, and he took my hand and we began walking - which made my heart jump a little… what the hell is he doing?**

**\---**

**“Hey you want some of this?” Kihyun asked talking about his ice cream, and I nodded and he was about to give to me, but he put it back in his mouth, as I was about to lean in to get a bite, and I glared at him as he laughed softly… oh two can play it this game.**

**“Hey, Kihyun, you want some of mine?” I ask and he nodded and I was going to give it to him, but I pushed it on his nose before he got a chance to eat it, and I laughed as he had chocolate ice cream on his nose**

**“Oops.” I say as I faked being surprised and I laughed**

**“I guess I deserved that.” Kihyun says as he wipes his nose off and I nodded**

**“Yeah, you did.” I say to him as I laughed, and he laughed as well, and I saw my phone go off and it was a notification from Instagram, and I clicked on the notification, and I saw it was about the post I posted like thirty minutes ago**

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***11,000 Hearts***

**JaseyBearrrr: Just a little ice cream date w/ @HamsterHyun … who can say no to ice cream? I mean not me that’s for sure!!**

**Comments: @Honeybee: You’re on an actual date?!**   
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**@IAMWHATIAM: Jasey, I knew you liked him!!**

**@Sleepwon: God I can’t go one Instagram post without couples in my face?**

**@MuscleBunny: @Sleepwon we’re together y’know?  
@MuscleBunny: But you guys are just sooooo cute!!  
@PapaBear: Wow, I was gone off Instagram for a few days to see this? We’re gonna have to talk.  
@SunshineHyukie: AWW GOALS!!!!!!!**

**“Will your girlfriend, get mad that we’re hanging out?” I ask Kihyun and he sighed and shrugged**

**“I don’t know, who knows.” Kihyun says… is this cheating? I mean, we’re just hanging out, and we’re not like dating.**

**\---**

**“Are you sure, you wanted to meet my siblings?” I ask Kihyun as we walk in my house and he nodded**

**“Well, I wanted to meet your youngest brother.” Kihyun says and I put the keys in the bowel**

**“Well my oldest brother, Hyunjin is hanging out with his boyfriend, Darren is hanging out with his friends, and I think Taehyuik is here.” I tell Kihyun and he nodded “Taehyuik!” I call and Taehyuik walks down with Jimin in his arms**

**“Oh thank god, you’re home, I can’t stand to be with him anymore.” Taehyuik complains and I rolled my eyes**

**“He’s 5, Taehyuik.” I tell him and he sighed and he gave him to me**

**“He’s yours now, I’m finally free.” Taehyuik cheered and he ran back upstairs**

**“He’s mean, Jazzy.” Jimin told me and I look at him and he nodded**

**“Jazzy?” Kihyun asked me**

**“It’s a nickname that he picked up from Jooheon.” I say to Kihyun and Jimin looked over at Kihyun and his eyes lit up**

**“Jazzy, is this is your boyfriend?” Jimin asked me and I widened my eyes**

**“Umm no, this is a good friend of mine, Kihyun.” I tell Jimin and I put him down and he ran over to Kihyun and hugged his legs and I smiled softly**

**\---**

**I came back from the kitchen, to see Kihyun had my phone again, and I sighed and chuckled, and he took a picture of himself and Jimin and I smiled, and Kihyun looked over and smiled “You wanna see?” Kihyun asked and I nodded and he handed me my phone and I looked at the post**

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***4,000 Hearts***

**JaseyBearrrr: Hacked by @HamsterHyun again, but this is now my new favorite person!!**

**Comments: @Honeybee: Omg Jasey let us meet him!!**   
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**@Sleepwon: He even met your siblings?**

**@IAMWHATIAM: Omg this is actually kind of cute  
@MuscleBunny: Why am I jealous of him and Jimin?  
@PapaBear: This is really cute  
@SunshineHyukie: AWW!!!  
@Jungkookie: He’s just going to hurt you know?**

**The last comment, made my heart just churn and my stomach just dropped… shit! “What’s wrong?” Kihyun asked me and I sighed**

**“Jungkook, commented on my post.” I say to him and he was shocked**

**“Don’t you have him blocked?” Kihyun asked me and I shook my head**

**“No. And before you say something, I know it’s stupid, but I thought he would just stay away from my Instagram, since he has me blocked.” I tell Kihyun and I sighed, this is just so screwed. He’s going to fuck with me, until I’m broken and gone. Well I guess that’s a good use of my nickname, he gave me after we broke up. Gone girl… fitting huh? Ugh, this is just getting out of hand. I can’t even tell my parents or my siblings, because one, I don’t talk to my parents, because they treat me different just because I’m the only girl, I can’t tell my siblings because they wouldn’t understand, I mean I don’t even get along with half of them. I’ll just tell Changkyun and the others, I mean they will beat up Jungkook, yeah sure, but at least he will stay off my back… right? Ugh, probably not, but I just want him out of my life for good!**

**A/N**

**Here’s chapter 6!!!**

**Wow this story is actually going by quickly, because there is going to be like 20 chapters in total!!**

**Jasey and Kihyun are just way too cute!!**

**DON’T BE A SILENT READER, SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS!!**

**[RAELEE]**


	10. 7: Wêåkñê§§

**7: Wêåkñê§§**

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

**I was sitting in my room near the window in the sunlight, and I saw that my shadow was coming off the wall, and I heard the camera go off and I look over to see Changkyun holding on to my phone and I snort “Really?” I ask him and he smiled and Jooheon wrapped his arm around Changkyun and looked at the photo**

**“It’s a really good photo, Jazzy.” Jooheon told me and I looked at the photo and I smiled and nodded and I saw Hoseok and Hyungwon looked at the time on their phone**

**“Oh shit, we’re gonna have to go, but we’ll see you tomorrow.” Hoseok says and he placed a kiss on my head and they both walked out and I look over at Minhyuk, Jooheon, Changkyun, and Hyunwoo**

**“Are you guys gonna go too?” I ask them and Minhyuk sighed**

**“I’ve got tons of homework to do, but I’ll hang out with you all day tomorrow.” Minhyuk told me and I nodded and he got up from my bed and he walked out of my room**

**“I’ve got to go to work, but I’ll see you later.” Hyunwoo tells me and I smiled and waved and he left and Jooheon and Changkyun were the only ones that were left in my room and I sighed**

**“Guys, go on your date, we can hang out tomorrow.” I told Changkyun and Jooheon and they both got flustered and they nodded and they left the room, so it’s just me in the room, and I sighed and I leaned against the window and I closed my eyes**

**\---**

***Next Day***

**I get dressed in my striped tee, my black ripped skinny jeans, converse, my pair of fake glasses, and my denim jacket and I had posted that photo that Changkyun took of me yesterday and when I had done that, I started to make my way to school, but I really didn’t look at the comments that were on the post, because I was in a hurry to get to school.**

****

***13,000 Hearts***

**JaseyBearrrr: “And really I could fall in love with anybody, who don't want me, so I just keep saying “I hate everybody” But maybe I don't”**   
****

**PIC CRED: @IAMWHATIAM**

**Comments: @Honeybee: Girl you look sooo good!!  
** **@Sleepwon: Damn, Changkyun takes good photos!!  
** **@IAMWHATIAM: The caption is very worrying Jaseybear  
** **@MuscleBunny: Ughh god my child so pretty!  
** **@PapaBear: Uh excuse me @MuscleBunny she’s my child!  
** **@SunshineHyukie: Wahhh this picture looks better than expected haha sorry @IAMWHATIAM  
** **@HamsterHyun: This caption… are you okay Jasey?  
** **@KarenLee: Why are you hanging out with my boyfriend?**

**I walked into school, after putting out my cigarette and I saw my friends by my locker and I smiled and I walked over to them and they scrunch their faces up from the smell of the cigarette**

**“Jeez, Jazzy, ever heard of second hand smoke?” Jooheon asked me and I bit my lip and chuckled awkwardly**

**“Heh, sorry, just needed a smoke.” I tell them**

**“Who cares about that, have you seen the comments on your newest post?” Changkyun asked me and I shook my head**

**“No, I posted it before I left, because I was in a hurry… why?” I ask him, and he showed me the post and I saw the comments, and I saw one from one specific person… oh shit! “Oh my god.” I say**

**“She commented on your post, one how the hell did she find out, and two who in the hell told her?” Hyungwon asked and I shrugged**

**“I don’t know, but I’m going to go see Kihyun after school at his school library.” I say**

**“Jazzy, she probably goes to the same school as him, so she’ll be able to see you.” Jooheon told me and I sighed and nodded**

**“This is stupid, I mean they’re just hanging out as friends, and it’s not like they are sneaking around cheating. What is the big deal?” Hoseok asked and I agreed with him, what is the big deal with hanging out with him? I mean, if she stops him from having female friends, then she’s got big problems.**

**\---**

**“Hey do you think it’s good to show weakness?” I ask Kihyun as we were walking, while I smoking a cigarette. Ever since he found out about me smoking, he doesn’t judge me, which is what I love about him - wait, love? Uhhh this is just stressing me out!!**

**“Hmmm, it depends. But if you do show weakness, I’ll be there to save you.” Kihyun told me while he had his arms up to show his muscles and I chuckled and hummed and I then thought about something**

**“Kihyun, have you ever shown weakness?” I ask him and he then frowned and sighed**

**“Maybe.” Kihyun told me and I looked over at him**

**“How?” I ask him and he then took my cigarette out from my mouth and he threw it on the ground**

**“When my mom died, I showed a lot of weaknesses.” He says and I widen my eyes, “Me and Karen, actually fight a lot, being friends and being in a relationship is not really good, and when my mom died we stopped fighting, but once I felt better we started fighting again, and she left that day… I had met you.” Kihyun continued and I was shocked “It’s good to show weakness, but it’s not good to show it to someone who can take advantage of it.” Kihyun told me and he continued walking and I was just really shocked by the whole situation. I then pull myself out of my thoughts and I ran after him**

**“Do you really love her?” I ask him the big question and he looked over at me with this look of surprise**

**“Why would you ask me that?” He asked me and I sighed**

**“I’m sorry for asking that stupid ass question, but I really just want to know.” I tell him… this is where I lose a great friend**

**“You’re unbelievable Jasey. Of course, I still love her.” Kihyun told me and he walked off and I sighed, and I felt a tear roll down my face, and I wipe away the tear**

**“Shit.” I whisper**

**\---**

**“I can’t believe you said that though.” Hyunwoo says and I blew a puff of smoke out, and I sighed**

**“I know, but that girl is not a good person.” I tell him, but it sounded like I was telling myself that**

**“Jazzy, you can’t say that stuff, about someone who you only met once.” Jooheon told me and I nodded**

**“I know, I feel like I completely just fucked over the friendship I had with him. Ugh, he probably hates me now.” I say and I run my hand through my hair. Why do I always fuck things over with the best people? I mean, I couldn’t see that my ex boyfriend was cheating on me, I didn’t see how he didn’t give me that affection, that he was giving me in the beginning of the relationship. I just didn’t see that. Because I’m blind. I threw my cigarette down and I stood up and that got my friends attention**

**“Where are you going?” Hoseok asked me and I sighed**

**“I’m just going to go for a walk for a while.” I say and I then stick my hands in my pockets of my jacket and I began to walk away from them, and I found myself making my way over to the bridge, and I sighed and I leaned against the rails, and I looked up to the sky and sighed, “Dad, can you help me out here?” I ask myself, but then I chuckle, knowing that shit is not going to work “I’ll see you soon.” I whisper, and I back away from the railing and started to walk again… what am I going to do?**

**A/N**

**Here’s chapter 7!!**

**Whew, that didn’t go as planned**

**Karen knows about Jasey and Kihyun hanging out… yikes**

**There’s going to be some dramarama in the next couple of chapters, just to let you know**

**DON’T BE A SILENT READER, SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS!!!**

**[RAELEE]**


	11. 8: Ì Ððñ'† ðwê ¥ðµ å gðÐÐåmñ †hïñg!

**8: Ì Ððñ'† ðwê ¥ðµ å gðÐÐåmñ †hïñg!**

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

**I feel like my blue skies turned gray. I mean… more gray than they usually are. But, when I met Kihyun I felt everything become more lighter, but after what happened it just became darker. Ugh, I’m such an idiot. I walk through the school halls with this look of boredom on my face. As I make my way over to my locker, to grab my books, I see Jungkook walk up to me… Jesus, what do you want now? “Hey, Jasey.” He greeted and I looked over at him with this look of ‘go away’ on my face**

**“What do you want?” I ask him**

**“So, I heard that you and Kihyun got into a fight, about y’know the whole Karen and Kihyun situation. Since I was technically the one who told her, you were hanging out with Kihyun, so I guess you owe me for helping you.” Jungkook told me and I slammed my locker shut and I look over at him, with this look that could kill**

**“I don’t owe you a goddamn thing!” I yelled and that caused everyone to look at me, and I sighed, trying to calm myself down, and I just walked away from him, all pissed off, while everyone stared at me. It felt like slow motion as I was walking through this suffocating moment.**

**\---**

**“He’s such an asshole!” I yell to my friends while I was kicking a wall and punching it out of just pure anger**

**“Jasey, calm down before you hurt yourself.” Hyungwon says and grabbed my arms and pulled me away from the wall**

**“Because of him, I could’ve just screwed up my friendship with Kihyun.” I say to Hyungwon and he sighed**

**“That is not true.” He told me and I sighed and I sat down on the ground**

**“He hasn’t answered my texts.” I say to them**

**“Well call him.” Jooheon told me and I sighed and I nodded and I went over to Kihyun’s contact in my phone and I called him, and I heard it ringing and ringing, but it went to voicemail and I sighed**

**“Hey, Ki, it’s me Jasey, I’m really sorry about what I said a couple of days ago, I really regret it. I say these things that I don’t mean, because I don’t think before I speak. I guess this is the reason why I can’t hold up with any friendship or relationship for that matter, it’s because I’m too blind to see what I do or say… I just want you to know that I’m so so sorry Kihyun.” I leave a voicemail, and I felt the tears just leave my eyes and I sighed, and that caused my friends to hug me and I appreciated the comfort of my bestest friends of all time.**

**\---**

**_Kihyun’s P.O.V_ **

**_I walk out of the shower, drying my hair with a towel, and I went over to my phone, and I saw I had a missed call from Jasey. It’s been 3 days since what had happened, and I actually haven’t seen her since that day. She’s sent me a bunch of texts but I just don’t respond to them. What she said really hurt me. But it also made me think about what she said. Do I still love Karin? I mean, we’ve been together for 6 years, but as the years go by, those feelings begin to fade… maybe she’s right. Maybe I don’t fully Karin, as much as I should. I saw that Jasey left a message and I decided to play it ‘Hey, Ki, it’s me Jasey, I’m really sorry about what I said a couple of days ago, I really regret it. I say these things that I don’t mean, because I don’t think before I speak. I guess this is the reason why I can’t hold up with any friendship or relationship for that matter, it’s because I’m too blind to see what I do or say… I just want you to know that I’m so so sorry Kihyun.’ She says and by the tone of her voice, I knew she was trying so hard not to cry, or something made her so angry from a moment before… but either way, her voice was shaky. I see Karen walk in the room, and she sighed_ **

**_“I uh I heard Jasey’s voice.” She says and I sighed and nodded_ **

**_“Yeah, we got into an altercation a few days ago, and we haven’t seen each other since.” I tell her and she sighed_ **

**_“Kihyun, do you still love me?” She asked me and I was shocked by that question_ **

**_“What? Of course I do.” I tell her and she chuckled_ **

**_“Kihyun, you’re always in Jasey’s Instagram posts, and you look more happy there than when you take pictures with me, you always talk about her with a smile on your face, a bigger smile than when you talk to me. Kihyun, just admit you don’t love me and love her.” She told me and I sighed_ **

**_“She asked me that question 3 days ago, and I lashed out on her.” I tell her and she sighed_ **

**_“Kihyun, just answer the question.” Karin begged and I sigh softly and I shook my head_ **

**_“I do love you, but not in the way you think I do.” I tell her and she exhaled a deep breath and nodded_ **

**_“I have a confession to make.” She says and I nodded, basically telling her to go on “That day, I walked out, saying I wouldn’t come back, I met someone. And it felt so wrong to be with him, but it kinda felt right too. I know we were technically still together, but I didn’t think I was going to come back, but he told me to go back, but recently me and him have been hanging out, and I think I’ve fallen for him.” She told me and I sighed_ **

**_“So, is this it? Is this the end of us?” I ask her and she shrugged her shoulders up and then down_ **

**_“I guess it is.” Karin told me and I nodded, feeling that weight on my shoulder just being lifted_ **

**_“Are we still going to be friends?” I ask her and she laughed_ **

**_“What? You think just because we broke up, that doesn’t mean we can still be friends?” She asked and I shrugged_ **

**_“I don’t know, maybe.” I confess and she shook her head_ **

**_“I feel like we get along more as friends, then boyfriend and girlfriend.” She told me and I sighed and nodded_ **

**_“That’s true.” I tell her and she had her hand out for me to shake_ **

**_“Friends?” She asked and I shook her hand and smiled_ **

**_“Friends.” I say and I hugged her and she hugged back. I then started to think about Jasey and her voicemail… I need to talk to her._ **

**A/N**

**Here’s chapter 8!!!**

**So Kihyun and Karen have broken up… oooop**

**Oh if you’re confused by the use of Karen and Karin… no it’s not a different person, it’s just one is her english name and one is the Korean one… I decided to use both, but I’m going to use Karen, because I use it more than Karin**

**DON’T BE A SILENT READER, SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS!!!**

**[RAELEE]**


	12. 9: Ì†'§ ¢ðmþlï¢å†êÐ

**9: Ì†'§ ¢ðmþlï¢å†êÐ**

**_Kihyun’s P.O.V_ **

**_*Next Day*_ **

**_I woke up to my alarm clock, knowing it was 7:00 am… ugh I don’t want to wake up. kill me now! But then I remembered that I needed to talk to Jasey today. I shot up from my bed, putting on something random, not even bothering to brush my hair… or teeth… whoops. But I got my shoes on, grabbed my phone and keys and bolted out the door._ **

**_\---_ **

**_I made it to the school campus, and I was about to walk through the gate, but the on campus security guard stopped me… shit, I totally forgot about him, “Yoo Kihyun, one of our famous alumni, what brings you here?” He asked and I sighed, I got no time for this_ **

**_“I need to talk to someone.” I say to him and he sighed_ **

**_“As much as I love you, kid, but you can’t get in here without a visitor’s pass, you know that.” He told me and I sighed, I need a distraction_ **

**_“Hey, I think I saw some kids smoking in the back.” I say and he looked angry_ **

**_“Not on my watch.” He says and he left the post, and I just ran in the campus gate, and running up to the building, he’s so gonna know I ran in here, but whatever, I need to talk to Jasey._ **

**\---**

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

***A Minute Before***

**I put my cigarette out, as I heard the bell ring, indicating that 0 period was over, and the start of the first period was going to start soon. I walk inside the building, going over to my locker, and I was going to use my combo to open, and I see Changkyun walk over to me “Have you heard from Kihyun?” He asked me and I sighed and shook my head**

**“I don’t even think he heard my voicemail.” I say to Changkyun and his eyes widened**

**“I think he did.” Changkyun told me and I turned around and I see him walking towards my direction, well more like speeding towards my direction… has he lost his mind?**

**“Hey, uh you must be Changkyun, but I need to borrow Jasey.” Kihyun says to Changkyun and I looked over at him and I saw he didn’t have a visitor's pass**

**“Where’s your visitor’s pass?” I ask him and his lips went into a thin straight line “Don’t tell me you went through the gate, passing the on campus security guard, without a visitor’s pass.” I say and he sighed**

**“I need to talk to you, and before the guy catches me.” Kihyun told me**

**“Have you lost your mind?” I ask him and he looked pretty scared about the security guard catching him**

**“Come on, Jasey, I really need to talk to you.” Kihyun told me and I sighed**

**“Kihyun, first period starts in like 3 minutes.” I say to him**

**“Yoo Kihyun!” I hear the guard’s voice and Kihyun’s eyes widened**

**“Come on.” Kihyun says and I shut my locker, and I took a hold of his hand and he started to pull me and we began running out of the school building and off the campus, before the security guard can catch us. I felt the adrenaline rush through my veins, as I was running with Kihyun - hand in hand, if I might add.**

**\---**

**We finally made it somewhere… I don’t know where we were, but we were far away from the school, and I was out of breath, like I physically couldn’t breathe, holding on to my chest couldn’t breathe… oh my god! “Kihyun, what did you want to talk to me for, that you had to drag me out of my school?” I ask him out of breath, holding on to my chest**

**“Whoa, Jasey, are you okay?” Kihyun asked me, putting his hands on my arms, as I was trying to catch my breath**

**“Yeah, I’m fine, just answer my question.” I say to him and he nodded**

**“Well, firstly, I just wanted to apologize about the way I just flipped out on you, it was completely uncalled for, and I’m so sorry for ignoring your texts.” He apologized and I shook my head, as I finally got my breathing back to normal, being with anxiety and being out of breath is like a fucking panic attack**

**“No. I’m the one who should be apologizing, I don’t know why I had to ask that question.” I tell Kihyun**

**“To be honest, why did you ask it?” Kihyun asked me and I sighed, I really can’t tell him the reason why I ask him the question: Oh yeah, hey, I’m so madly in love with you, and you’re the only one who can make me happy like this. No, I can’t tell him that - wait did I just say “in love”. I mean, yeah I do like him, but I don’t know if I’m in love with him.**

**“It’s complicated.” I tell him with an awkward smile**

**“Jasey, me and Karen, broke up.” Kihyun says and I widen my eyes, wait what? Is it because of me?**

**“What? Why?” I ask him**

**“We both just fell out of love with each other, and you were right I guess I didn’t love her, like I thought I did.” He told me and I sighed and looked down at the ground, and he looked down at my face “What’s with the long face?” He asked and I shrugged**

**“It’s because I'm the reason you guys broke up.” I tell him and he chuckled and shook his head**

**“That is so not true.” Kihyun told me and he pulled me into a hug, and I was shocked at the sudden hug, because we never really hugged before. “Me and Karen are still friends, I mean we’ve been friends since we were little kids. Besides, me and her get along better as friends than being in a relationship.” Kihyun told me and I smile softly,**

**“I was so worried that we weren’t going to be friends anymore ever since that day.” I tell him and he chuckled**

**“Who says we were gonna stop being friends. We’re always going to be friends.” Kihyun told me and I felt my heart just crack a little bit. Kihyun, has made me smile more in the past month, than my friends have made me smile in the whole two years of being friends. I don’t know, it’s just how Kihyun is. It’s the way he talks. The way he smiles. The way he laughs. The way he nags about everything, and how sensitive he is. I just feel like I can be myself when I’m with him. alright here it goes. I’m in love with Yoo Kihyun.**

**A/N**

**Here’s chapter 9!!**

**Omg Jasey just confessed that she’s in love with Kihyun… I mean who wouldn’t have thought haha!!**

**But we’re almost halfway through this story and I’m like so shocked how close to the end we are!**

**DON’T BE A SILENT READER, SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS!!!**

**[RAELEE]**


	13. 10: Ðïål †ðñê§

**10: Ðïål †ðñê§**

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

***Timeskip: 1 week***

**“Do we have to meet him?” Jooheon complained and I look over at him and nodded**

**“Yes, Jooheon, because I want to see his beautiful face in real life.” Hoseok told Jooheon and I laughed and Hyungwon just glared at him**

**“But I don’t like him.” Jooheon says and I snicker**

**“You’ve never even met him.” I told him and he nodded**

**“I know.” He told me smiling, dimples showing and I shook my head**

**“Changkyun, met him.” Minhyuk says and Jooheon looked over at Changkyun**

**“Say what?” He asked and I rolled my eyes, and Hyunwoo just looked like he wanted to leave this conversation**

**“Oh there he is.” Changkyun says and we all look over to see Kihyun walking over to us and I stood up from the grass, wiping off the dirt on my pants and I walked over to Kihyun**

**“Guys, this is Kihyun, and Kihyun, these are my overly obnoxious friends, Hyunwoo, Hoseok, Hyungwon, Minhyuk, Jooheon, and you obviously met Changkyun.” I say and he nods and I leaned closer to whisper in his ear “Oh, and the one glaring you is Jooheon, don’t take it personal. He’s like my mother.” I whisper**

**“I heard that!” Jooheon exclaimed**

**“Good.” I say to him sarcastically and that caused Kihyun to laugh**

**\---**

****

***23,000 Hearts***

**JaseyBearrrr: Look who finally met!! Jooheon was very salty about meeting Kihyun, but these guys are now really good friends!**   
****

**_*COMMENTS ARE DISABLED FOR THIS POST*_ **

**“Y’know, I just realized this.” Kihyun spoke up and he looked over at me “Jasey, doesn’t even show herself in her pictures, why?” Kihyun question as he took a swig of his beer, and I sighed**

**“It’s because I want to be very aesthetic about my posts, and I think me being in them ruins the aesthetic.” I tell him as I took a swig of my beer**

**“I will post a picture of you on my Instagram one day.” Kihyun told me and I laughed, and nodded**

**“Alright, keep dreaming.” I tell him sarcastically, and that caused them to laugh**

**\---**

**“Alright, question: what is the worst thing to hear when you’re in a relationship?” I ask, as I was leaning against Kihyun’s shoulder, as we were kinda tipsy, but not fully drunk or wasted.**

**“We need to talk.” Jooheon commented**

**“It’s not you it’s me.” Changkyun says**

**“You’re overreacting.” Hyungwon answered**

**“If you really loved me, you wouldn’t do this.” Hoseok says**

**“I can’t live without you.” Hyunwoo spoke**

**“I don’t know if we’re right for each other.” Minhyuk comments**

**“Dial tones.” Kihyun says with no emotion in his voice, and that caused all of us to suddenly burst out laughing, by the random ass answer, “I’m serious! You don’t know how many times I've heard dial tones in my relationships, it’s like they don’t care that they are just hurting me by ignoring me or hanging up on me when I say that “I’m sorry”.” Kihyun says and I sighed**

**“What about you, Jasey?” Hyungwon asked me and I sighed softly, and I bit my lip**

**“You were a waste of my time.” I say softly**

**“Jungkook, said that?” Minhyuk asked me, knowing that the only relationship I’ve ever had in my life, was being with Jungkook. And when we broke up, I didn’t want to show my weaknesses, or vulnerability to the person I really love dearly, incase they decided they want to leave me, after I cry in front of them**

**“Yeah, he did.” I tell him and I took the last sip of my beer**

**“That’s fucked up to say.” Changkyun says and I sigh softly**

**“I feel bad for all the girls he’s with, because he’s just going to cheat on them and then leave them when they’re at the happiest in their life.” I say, and I looked over at Kihyun and I sighed, there is no way that he will ever love me like I love him.**

**\---**

**“Why do you have this?” Kihyun asked me as he picked up my stuffed animal and I sighed**

**“It’s my emotional support, other than my dog.” I tell him**

**“Oh yeah, she cries into that thing a lot to just to let you know.” Hyungwon says and I throw a pillow at him, and it landed right in his face and that caused Hoseok to laugh very loudly**

**“You set yourself up for that one.” Hyunwoo told Hyungwon, like it was a matter of fact and I smiled**

**“I didn’t know she would throw it like 0.5 seconds after I said that.” Hyungwon says in pain and I shrugged**

**“Nice sunglasses, bro.” Minhyuk says and I looked over to him and I saw he was wearing my yellow lense sunglasses and I chuckled**

**“Did you ever think about the choice of sunglasses you were getting?” Kihyun asked me looking at my pairs of sunglasses**

**“Shut up.” I say to him**

**“I especially like these ones.” Kihyun says picking up the sunglasses with the aviator top on them and he took the other ones off and he put the pair he just picked up on and that caused my friends to laugh, but for me to look at him mesmerized, of how good looking he was in those sad excuse pair of sunglasses “Wait, I want to see how this looks.” Kihyun says taking off the glasses and picking up the first pair of sunglasses and he puts them back on and he puts the second pair of glasses on my stuffed animal and that caused all of us to start laughing, even Kihyun, it made him laugh the second he did that.**

**“Oh my god, Jasey, you picked the right one.” Minhyuk told me and I looked over at him, with this look. What the hell is that supposed to mean?**

**“Yeah, Jasey, he’s hilarious.” Jooheon told me and I smile softly, I’m so happy that they like Kihyun, because I was worried that they wouldn’t like him, I mean Jooheon didn’t like him for the first five minutes, but he started talking about what he likes and that cause Jooheon to immediately switch his views on him. When I met him, I thought he was just going to be a good friend, but my feelings are really showing different, but I really don’t know if he likes me like that. I mean, why would he? I’m not the person everyone likes to be in a relationship with, my last boyfriend didn’t like being with me he went so far as to cheating on me… am I that boring and pathetic?**

**A/N**

**Here’s chapter 10!!**

**We’re halfway through this story and I’m really excited for the next chapters!!**

**DON’T BE A SILENT READER, SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS!!!**

**[RAELEE]**


	14. 11: Måkê mê £êêl ålrïgh†

**11: Måkê mê £êêl ålrïgh†**

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

***Midnight***

**I had fallen asleep working on some Math and History homework, but what woke me up was my phone ringing. I groaned, thinking who in their right mind, would be calling at this hour? I moved my books and papers and I grabbed it and I saw it was like ‘12:00 AM’ and I sighed, but then I looked over at the caller ID and it said ‘Kiki’. Why the hell is Kihyun calling me at midnight? I answer the phone and say “Hello?” so tiredly, but what made me jump awake, was when I heard sniffling, like someone was crying, and that someone was Kihyun**

**‘Jasey, I need to see you. Can you please come to the bridge?’ He asked and I felt my heart just swell up at the tone of his voice, it sounded so sad and so vulnerable**

**“Alright, I’ll meet you in 10 minutes.” I say and I hung up my phone, and I got my hoodie on, with some comfortable boots, and I grabbed my glasses and put them on, because I really don’t care about my appearance right now, because I’m just going to see Kihyun, and it’s not like I’m going to school. I opened my window and I climb out of it, and jump down to the ground, careful about not breaking my legs. Climbing out of my window has always helped me in ways of sneaking out, since walking out the front door is way too much noise. I look up to see if the lights come on through my brothers or parents windows, and when they didn’t, I sigh in relief, and I began to make my way over to the bridge where I was supposed to meet Kihyun. I hope he’s okay.**

**\---**

**I made it over to the bridge, exactly 10 minutes, just like I told Kihyun, and even in the darkness, I saw Kihyun’s shoulders shaking, and I sped up my walking to the point I was running over to him, and he looked up and I saw the tear streaks running down his face, and I frowned, and I pulled him into a hug, and I held on tightly “What happened, Kihyun?” I ask him softly as I let go of him slowly and he sniffled, holding on to my arms**

**“My father… he uh he died yesterday.” Kihyun told me with his lips trembling, and I frowned, as the tears began running down his face**

**“Oh, I’m so sorry.” I whisper and I wipe away his tears, and he leaned his head against mine, this is the first time he is showing any vulnerability to me, it’s hurting my heart seeing him like this, because he’s more happy than he is sad.**

**“My father, was the only thing I had left of my mom, now I’m alone.” Kihyun cried and I shook my head**

**“No, Kihyun, you’re not alone. You have me. You have Karen. You have our friends. Don’t say you’re alone, because you’re not.” I tell him and he just stared at me with his tear filled brown eyes, and he smiled softly, and he pressed his lips softly against mine, and it was only for a few seconds, I didn’t even have enough time to react to what was even happening**

**“You’re the only one, who makes me so happy, you’re the only one who can make me feel alright on my bad days, which have been happening a lot recently. One of the many reasons why me and Karen broke up is because I’m in love with you.” Kihyun confessed and I was shocked… did he just confess his love to me?**

**“Kihyun are just saying this because you’re not in the right headspace, or are you being serious?” I ask him and he nodded**

**“I’m seriously so in love with you, it’s not even funny.” He told me and I felt the tears roll down my face with a huge smile on it as well**

**“I feel the same way about you as well.” I tell him and I stood up on my tippy toes of my shoes and I kissed him, it wasn’t a long one, but I felt the love in it, as I would probably feel with a long one. I pulled back and the tears still rolled down and I pulled him back into a hug and I held on tightly, and I felt my jacket get a little damp from his tears**

**\---**

***7:00 AM***

****

***22,000 hearts***

**JaseyBearrrr: From the first moment I met you, I never thought we would even be together, but knowing how much you make me smile and laugh, it was bound to happen someday, I just didn’t know that you would feel the same way as I do. I will make you feel alright on your bad days and I hope you do the same thing as me… I love you Kihyun. @HamsterHyun**

**Comments: @Honeybee: Omg you guys are together?!**

**@Sleepwon: Ah more couple stuff in my timeline**

**@IAMWHATIAM: Oh good baby Jesus finally!!**   
**@MuscleBunny: You owe me 30 bucks @SunshineHyukie !!**   
**@Papabear: I’m happy for you two**   
**@SunshineHyukie: Dammit I just lost 30 bucks**

**I woke up to the face of my boyfriend… it feels good to say that… boyfriend, and I saw that he was still asleep, so I just scoot closer to him, to the point where I could wrap my arms around him. It’s a good thing it was Saturday, or I would be desperately running around to get ready for school. I saw Kihyun’s eyes flutter open and I smiled softly, and he looked over at me and smiled as well**

**“I’m sorry for putting you in that position last night.” Kihyun told me and I shook my head**

**“Like you said: It’s good to show weakness and vulnerability, to the person you trust the most.” I told him and he nodded, and he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me closer to him, and he placed his chin on my forehead “Do you have classes to go to today?” I ask him and he shook his head**

**“I’ve got some on Monday.” He told me and I nodded and I placed a kiss on his cheek, and he got very flustered at my action and I smiled and chuckled. Never in a million years, I thought this was going to happen. I thought me and him were just completely stay friends, never thought we would be in a relationship. I hope being in a relationship makes me feel better about myself, since I don’t really like myself. I’m always differentiating between staying and leaving. I have to stay for my friends and family - well mostly my friends. But, I have to leave because I don’t have a purpose in this world… well that’s until I met Kihyun.**

**A/N**

**Here’s chapter 11!!**

**Okay this is kinda of the end of Part A!!**

**What I mean, is that this book is split up in two parts… stupid I know.**

**But it’s like two different story lines.**

**Chapter 12-20 is going to be part B basically talking about Jasey and Kihyun’s relationship, and it will not be all sunshine and rainbows, like Jasey thought it would be!!**

**DON’T BE A SILENT READER, SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS!!**

**[RAELEE]**


	15. 12: Ì†'§ åll vïvïÐ

**12: Ì†'§ åll vïvïÐ**

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

***3 weeks later***

**I sighed, as I walk through the gymnasium alone, because I totally was left behind my P.E. class. Assholes. I mean, yeah, the class was over, but the least thing you could do was keep the gym fucking open. I was walking over to the door, but then I stepped wrong and slipped and fell into the pool. Oh Jesus, I can’t swim! I was too frozen to even move, I can’t swim. I felt myself falling to the bottom to the pool, and I tried to flail my arms around, to see if that would get me out of this pool… but yeah that is not happening! Oh my god, I’m gonna die here! I’m going to die in my school pool! As my breathing started getting weaker, I felt myself start to drift into the bottom of the pool, as my eyes closed and I was in an immense darkness.**

**\---**

**_Kihyun’s P.O.V_ **

**_Changkyun told me something so horrific, that I had to come to the school, as fast as I could. I made it over to the gymnasium, and I saw all the boys just crowded around Jasey, as she was soaked from the pool water. “What happened?” I ask frantically as I ran over to her_ **

**_“We don’t know, we were going to pick her up from the gym, and we saw her in the pool, she can’t swim either.” Hyunwoo told me and I leaned down to see if there is a heartbeat, but I didn’t hear one_ **

**_“She’s got no heartbeat.” I say to myself and the boys looked terrified about what I said_ **

**_“I already called an ambulance.” Hyungwon says_ **

**_“An ambulance is not going to get here in time.” Changkyun says and I sighed and I began to do CPR to see if I can bring back her heartbeat, before the ambulance comes, because I know the ambulance will take forever_ **

**_“Come on, Jasey.” I whisper and I kept pressing on her chest, to see if that could bring her back_ **

**_“She’s not going to wake up.” Minhyuk says and I looked over at him with a glare on my face_ **

**_“You don’t know that!” I exclaim, and I gave her some air, and pressed more on her chest, until I finally just slammed my hands on her chest, and that caused her eyes to shoot open, and she started coughing up pool water, and I just let out a sigh of relief_ **

**_“Are you okay?” Jooheon asked her and she nodded slightly as she was breathing heavily, and she looked at me and she just hugged me tightly, and she began to shake and cry, and I held onto her tightly. I saw EMT’s run in, and that caused Jasey to look over at them and she sighed shakily_ **

**_“Are you okay, miss?” The EMT asked her and she sighed and she nodded, “Let’s check your vitals and see if everything is alright, now.” He told her and led her out of the gym, and basically out of the school, and we all followed them as well._ **

**_\---_ **

**_“Everything seems to be alright. You’re lucky, if you didn’t get help sooner, you would not have made it. Alright, you’re good to go.” The EMT told Jasey and she nodded, as she had a towel wrapped around her and the EMT looked over at me “Did you do CPR on her?” He asked me and I nodded_ **

**_“Yeah. I’m also her boyfriend.” I told him_ **

**_“Well, young man, you just saved your girlfriend’s life.” He told me and Jasey got up from the back of the ambulance and the EMT got back in the ambulance and the ambulance drove off and I looked over at Jasey and I sighed softly_ **

**_“Let’s go.” Jasey says and we nodded_ **

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

**“What had happened, Jasey?” Hoseok asked me, as we began walking off the school campus, and I sighed, trying to remember what had actually happened, since it’s all hazy**

**“I was walking out of the gym, and I think I stepped wrong, and I fell into the pool.” I answer him**

**“Do you remember anything?” Hyunwoo asked me and I sighed**

**“It’s all vivid, I can’t exactly remember anything right now. All remember is that I had these hands just slam down on my chest.” I say and that caused them to laugh, and Kihyun to smirk slightly and I looked down at my wet clothes and I cringe, “Alright, I’m going to have to change my clothes, this feels disgusting.” I say and they nodded**

**\---**

**I put something comfortable on, after taking a shower to get that chlorine smell off of me. It’s actually a really good thing my parents went on vacation took my brothers. I put my sweater on over my tank top, and I walk out of the bathroom, and downstairs to see the boys sleeping and Kihyun just sitting on the couch, and I saw that he was wearing an oversized sweater… a very oversized sweater “What’s with the really oversized sweater?” I ask him quietly and he stretched out his arms signalling me to come over to him, and I walked over to him and I sit down next to him, and he wrapped his arms around me, and I felt myself get buried in the sweater.**

**“For this reason.” He told me and I laughed softly and I cuddled into him, “You still smell like chlorine.” Kihyun commented and I look over at him**

**“Well there’s only so much marshmallow body wash and shampoo can do.” I tell him and he smiled**

**“You use marshmallow body wash and shampoo?” Kihyun asked and I looked down at the ground and nodded, “That’s adorable, you smell like marshmallows.” Kihyun teased and I rolled my eyes**

**“I don’t even know why I told you.” I tell you and he laughed**

**“I think it’s cute.” Kihyun told me and I sighed and I cuddled back into his arms, and I felt my eyes start to get heavy, and I closed them. This day has been the most scariest day I’ve ever experienced in my whole life. And I never want to experience it again.**

**A/N**

**Here’s chapter 12!!**

**Well, that’s the first near death experience Jasey’s had… but haha I’m more evil than having her almost drown!!**

**Alright there are 8 chapters left of 3am and I’m honestly surprised of how fast this story has flown by!**

**DON’T BE A SILENT READER, SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS!!!**

**[RAELEE]**


	16. 13: Wðrk wï†h ï†

**13: Wðrk wï†h ï†**

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

**Me and Kihyun were walking to get some ice cream but something had actually stopped me and got my attention. There were a couple of puddles on the ground, as it recently just rained, there was also a rainbow that was shining in the sky, and I saw within the puddles there was the rainbow. “Whoa, that is so cool.” I whisper to myself and I looked over to Kihyun, “hey Kihyun, take this photo for me, please.” I say to Kihyun and he looked over at me with this look**

**“Am I your photographer now?” Kihyun asked me and I laughed**

**“Work with it.” I say and I gave him my phone and he made sure to get the puddle that was full with the rainbow, and not to get my face, because I really don’t want my face on Instagram… even though half of the people who follow me, is from school. It’s just some people don’t know what I look like. Kihyun gave me back my phone after he took the photo and I went over to Instagram and I had posted that photo, without thinking of a good caption. “Alright, let’s go.” I tell Kihyun and he nods and we started walking again to get some ice cream, because we were both craving ice cream.**

****

***13,000 Hearts***

**JaseyBearrrr: Going on a little ice cream date with @HamsterHyun, and look at what we found… thanks to Kihyun for not showing my face**   
****

**PIC CRED: @HamsterHyun**

**Comments: @Honeybee: Wow I never knew that the ugly concrete could look so beautiful  
** **@Sleepwon: Omg I’m waiting for Kihyun just to expose your face on your Instagram  
** **@IAMWHATIAM: Lucky you guys get to go out, while I’m sick in bed with a 101 degree fever  
** **@PapaBear: That’s really cool  
** **@MuscleBunny: You guys are going out for ice cream and didn’t invite me?  
** **@SunshineHyukie: @Sleepwon, you wanna bet 30 bucks that Kihyun will expose Jasey’s face on his or her Instagram?**

**\---**

**After me and Kihyun left the ice cream shop we decided to stop at the park to look up at the sky, because the rainbow was still there… thank god. I was not gonna go home without seeing and taking a picture of that beautiful rainbow in the sky “Do we really have to stop to look at the sky? I’m freezing. I don’t know how you wear a tank top when it’s like 46 out here.” Kihyun nagged and I look over at him and I had sighed and shook my head, at the whiny comments he’s making, but to be honest, it’s really cute.**

**“Yeah, because who knows when you’re gonna get to see a beautiful opportunity to take a picture of this.” I told him and he furrowed his eyebrows**

**“Well the next time it rains, there will be another rainbow you can take a photo of.” Kihyun told me and I scoffed and shook my head**

**“I’ve lived here all my life, and I’ve never seen a rainbow like this before.” I tell him and he looked at me shocked but he let it go, and let me do what I wanted to do. So I took a picture of the rainbow and shadowed out the trees, and I posted it to Instagram**

****

***12,000 Hearts***

**JaseyBearrrr: On the way home, decided to take a picture of this beauty, but @HamsterHyun was being a whiny baby about being cold.**

**Comments: @Honeybee: Aww pretty!!  
** **@Sleepwon: So aesthetic… wow  
** **@IAMWHATIAM: Stop posting all this beautiful shit, while I’m sick in bed!  
** **@MuscleBunny: Haha you had to make Kihyun wait while it’s like 46 degrees out there  
** **@Papabear: Wow.  
** **@SunshineHyukie: Is this to remind me of how gay I am? Because I think it is!**

**“Okay, now we can go, you big baby.” I say and he cheered**

**“Yes! Finally!” Kihyun cheered and he started to run ahead and I chuckled and I shook my head**

**“Alright, wait up!” I call out and I started to run after him to catch up with him**

**\---**

**We finally got home to a place warm, so Kihyun would stop complaining. I also got a DM from Kihyun’s best friend Yoongi, and we talked for a few minutes and I asked him if he had any embarrassing photos of Kihyun, and sure enough he had some. Some of them were just tragic as hell, but this one was the funniest thing ever. I’m serious, he just sent me the most funniest photo I have ever seen in my whole life. Like it’s a photo of Kihyun when he was younger, and to be honest, he looks beautiful as always, but the photo is just hilarious. So hilarious, i have to share it… sorry Kihyun… not sorry.**

****

***11,000 Hearts***

**JaseyBearrrr: Omg AHHH, I’m sorry Kihyun, but thanks to @MinYoongi for this photo, it’s glorious! Why is my boyfriend so weird?**

**Comments: @Honeybee: Where’s the bleach at?  
** **@Sleepwon: Wow and I thought my old pictures were bad  
** **@IAMWHATIAM: Oooohhhh that’s cold Jasey  
** **@MuscleBunny: Wow… that’s all I could say  
** **@Papabear: I’ve never seen something so terrifying before, like right now  
** **@MinYoongi: Beautiful. Am I right?  
** **@KarenLee: Oh Jesus, I never thought I would see that picture again  
** **@SunshineHyukie: That’s… just… tragic  
** **@HamsterHyun: Oh now that’s just evil!**

**“You’re evil, Jasey!” Kihyun exclaimed and I laughed and he had climbed on me and I kept laughing as I kept trying to push him off of me, because he was tickling my sides, and to be honest, it kind of hurt, because he was tickling certain spots that were sensitive.**

**“Alright! Alright!” I exclaimed and he let go of me and sat down in front of me**

**“Did you ask Yoongi for that picture or did he just sent it to you?” Kihyun asked me and I sighed and chuckled**

**“I asked for an embarrassing photo of you, and some were pretty tragic, but that one is amazing.” I say to him and he laughed**

**“You’re evil.” He told me and I nodded**

**“I know.” I told him and he laughed and then wrapped his arms around me, and I leaned against him and I sighed, “That picture is just tragic though.” I tell him and he rolled his eyes**

**“Yeah, thanks for that.” He told me and I smiled and nodded**

**“You’re welcome.” I tell him and he chuckled and he placed a kiss on my head and I smile softly and I placed a kiss on his lips and I put my head back on his shoulder… he’s the only one who can make me feel like I have a purpose in this fucked up world.**

**A/N**

**Here’s chapter 13!!**

**Sorry for that Kihyun picture, but it’s just soooo damn hilarious!!**

**But the next few chapters are gonna be a little angsty… hehe sorry not sorry!!**

**There are 7 chapters left!!**

**DON’T BE A SILENT READER, SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS!!!**

**[RAELEE]**


	17. 14: †êll mê Ì'm £ïñê

**14: †êll mê Ì'm £ïñê**

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

***1 week later***

**Ugh. I just feel like absolute crap about myself. I’ve just been laying in my bed all day, and it’s only like 5:33 pm. I’ve been having one of those bad days, where my anxiety and depression just flare up, and I don’t want to get out of my bed, or go outside. It’s been happening for the past few days, and I’ve had to force myself out of my bed, and I just can’t take it anymore. I had gotten dressed but I didn’t have the courage to go outside today. I had covers over my head, while I had my eyes closed. Well until I heard the pounding on the door. “Jasey, come on, talk to me!” I heard the familiar voice yell and I placed my pillows together against my ears, hoping the sound will go away, “Jasey, please, just talk to me.” The voice got smaller and I sighed and I get up and I walked over to the door and I opened it, and I saw Kihyun, and he had these big heavy clothes on, and his hair was a mess, just like mine, but it looks like he just woke up**

**“What are you doing here?” I ask him with no emotion in my voice**

**“What’s happening, Jasey? What’s wrong?” Kihyun asked me as he stepped inside my room, and I sighed closing the door and I leaned my head against the door feeling a lose breath leave my lips, and I turned around and leaned against the door**

**“Nothing’s happening, I’m just tired.” I tell him and he looked at me and he had this look of concern and I tried to keep myself afloat, and tried to keep myself at bay. but I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t hold it up anymore. I felt my facade breaking and then I felt the tears leave my eyes and I turned my head away from him and leaned my head back on the door, “Don’t look at me Kihyun.” I tell him trying to keep the sobs in, and I feel arms go around my shoulders, and I feel Kihyun place his chin on my shoulder. I started to sob the second I felt his touch, and I felt my chest tighten up, as it felt like I was having a panic attack**

**“Is there anything you need?” Kihyun asked me softly and I sniffle trying so hard to keep the sobs in**

**“Tell me I’m fine. Please, that’s all I ask.” I cried and he tightened his grip on me**

**“Whatever this is, you’re gonna be okay, Jasey, you’re gonna be fine. I promise.” Kihyun told me in this sweet and loving voice, and I smiled softly and I leaned back to where my head was on his chest, and he looked down at me, and placed a kiss on my forehead, “You wanna talk about it?” Kihyun asked me in a gentle voice and I nodded softly**

**“I’ve been having one of my bad days, where my anxiety and depression just fall right down on me, and I’ve been forcing myself to get out of my bed, but today, I just couldn’t do it. I felt so useless about myself that I was self reflecting about it, and that made me more depressed.” I say to him feeling the tears leave my eyes and Kihyun placed a soft kiss on my neck**

**“You have had all of us worried, you know?” Kihyun asked me softly and I nodded**

**“I know, I know. I’m sorry, I just couldn’t have the courage to leave the house.” I tell him and he turned me around so I could face him**

**“I’m going to tell you, a time where I’ve had the same thing you had to deal with.” Kihyun told me and I nodded “Alright, when I was young, like maybe 8 or 9, me, Yoongi, and Karen were friends, but we also had another friend named Maeve. Maeve, was hilarious. She would always make fun of Yoongi, and me half of the time, but she was just - so funny. But when we were 10, her parents had gotten divorced and she just lost it. She stopped coming to school, smiling, laughing. She took everything to heart. And then one day, she uh didn’t show up to school, and we thought she was just sick, and me, Yoongi, and Karen had went to visit her, but we saw her mother crying, and she had told us, and that she had killed herself. She took a bunch of sleeping pills and overdosed.” Kihyun told me and I saw a few tears roll down his face, and I felt my heart just crack into pieces**

**“I’m uh ---” I stammer, not find the right words to say, but Kihyun placed his lips on mine, shutting me up**

**“You don’t have to say anything, just promise me, you won’t do anything that Maeve did to herself, I lost one person I loved, I don’t need to lose another one.” Kihyun told me and I nodded**

**“I promise.” I tell him and I hugged him tightly, that was probably the best thing he could’ve said to me at this moment.**

**“Tell me you’ll stay with me, even when everything starts to go wrong.” I beg Kihyun and he rocked me to the side**

**“Of course, I will.” Kihyun told me and I smiled softly**

**A/N**

**Here’s chapter 14!!!**

**Sorry this chapter is so short, it’s kinda like a part one for the next chapter which is gonna be more angsty than this one haha, sorry!!**

**There are officially 6 more chapters left, and if you were wondering if there will be a sequel to this book, and I’m sad to say… there is not. This is there will be only book of these two… that’s why I had two different story lines**

**DON’T BE A SILENT READER, SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS!!!**

**[RAELEE]**


	18. 15: Ððñ'† kñðw whå† †ð Ðð wï†h mê

**15: Ððñ'† kñðw whå† †ð Ðð wï†h mê**

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

**I wake up at 6:30 a.m. y’know my usual time I get up, and I just put on some random clothes on, and I didn’t even bother to put on some makeup, and the swoleness in my eyes, really brought out the color of my brown and green eyes. I posted a random photo on my Instagram, not caring about a good caption, and I began to make my way over to school… well more trudge my way over to school, because I just don’t really care. I know me and Kihyun talked like yesterday, what he had said, it made me feel a little better, but it wasn’t enough to make me feel lively, like he always does. I feel like this is just me giving up now. That is what it feels like. It feels like I’m just giving up, and to be honest, I think I am just going to give up. Because I can’t take it anymore.**

**\---**

****

***14,000 Hearts***

**JaseyBearrrr: Yikes… remember when I was truly happy? Yeah me neither.**

**Comments: @Honeybee: Jazzy?? Are you okay?**   
****

**@Sleepwon: Jas, it’s going to be okay**

**@IAMWHATIAM: Jasebear, don’t talk like that!  
@MuscleBunny: This is so worrying, Jasey, are you okay?  
@PapaBear: Do you want to talk about it during lunch?  
@SunshineHyukie: Who hurt you? I’ll fight them!  
@HamsterHyun: Are you okay baby?**

**I don’t know why I have such a colorful shirt on, when everything about me feels like it is all dark and gloomy. I walked into the school campus with a cigarette between my lips, not even giving a damn of the looks people were giving me. I just don’t care. I saw my friends walk up to me and they all looked worried about me “Jasey, are you okay?” Changkyun asked me and I just put my cigarette out and stomped on it**

**“Yeah, I’m fine.” I tell him, and I started walking**

**“Jaseybear, are you sure?” Hoseok asked me and i nodded**

**“Jasey, you don’t seem fine.” Hyungwon told me and I sighed**

**“Hyungwon, I said: I’m fine.” I tell him**

**“Jasey, you’re not fine.” Hyunwoo told me and I sighed**

**“I’m fine, can you guys stop asking?” I ask**

**“Jasey, can you just talk to us?” Minhyuk asked me but I stayed silent for this one, I can’t just get it through their heads that I’m fine, why can’t they just see that?**

**“Jasey -” Jooheon called and I turned around with a glare on my face**

**“I said I’m fine!” I yell and that caused people to look over at us and I sighed softly “I’m fine.” I say sharply and I began walking off from them, leaving them just so shocked and surprised, and to be honest, it left me shocked and surprised too. I’ve never lashed out on them before. Out of the 2 years of them being friends with me, I never lashed out on them. Ughh, what is wrong with me?**

**\---**

**I feel really bad about lashing out on my friends, but I couldn’t get through their head that I was fine. I had ignored them the whole day, which was really hard, because I have one or two of them in every single one of my classes. So right now, I was just sitting on my bed, just writing some stuff for English, and then my chest starts to tighten up, and my breathing becomes uneven, my hands start to tremble, and it feels like the walls are caving in on me, and my throat starts to close up. It was actually getting hard to breathe. I need to get out of here! I get off of my bed, and I started to run out of the room, ignoring the calls from my mother and my step father, and my brothers, I just need to get out of here! I ran out the door, and I kept running, converse hitting the hard solid concrete, hair flowing in the wind that had picked up, while I was running. My running led me to the bridge… the bridge that brought a lot of memories that I can’t deal with right now. I felt myself just let go, as my legs fell down to the ground, feeling like jelly, as I was running for the past 10-20 minutes. I held on to my chest, as I let out these sobs, I can’t handle this anymore. I can’t deal with the pain like this anymore! I need to just let go, and give up. I have to. I can’t keep going on like this. Having these days of feeling like shit, even though I was feeling alright the day before. I really don’t know what to do with me. The whole day, I was just thinking about what to do about what has been happening, but everything about it made me go back to that day… that day where I was going to end it. That day where I met Kihyun. That day is a blessing and it is also a curse. It is a blessing because I met the love of my life who can brighten up everything. But it’s also a curse, because I get to spend more days in this fucked up world, just having me go on. Each day I spend right now, is making it hard for me to breathe, and I don’t think I can hear myself think anymore. I think it’s taken over. I think I’ve truly lost myself.**

**\---**

**_Kihyun’s P.O.V_ **

**_After Jasey, posted that photo, with that worrying caption, I’ve been trying to get a hold of her, but of course she’s ignoring me again. And today, Changkyun told me that she lashed out on them, when they were just asking if she was okay, like the worried friends they are. I really wish I can just help her, make her happy, and take away her pain. But, being in pain for so long, and someone tries to help you, it’s hard for that pain to just go away. I take a sip of my whiskey, that Yoongi gave to me, and I sighed deeply, which caught the attention of Yoongi “You okay there, buddy?” He asked me and I sighed and shrugged_ **

**_“I’m just thinking about Jasey.” I tell him and he nodded_ **

**_“Alright, but why do you look so depressed, while you’re thinking about her?” He asked and I took another sip of my whiskey_ **

**_“She’s going through some stuff, and I don’t know how to help her.” I tell him and he nodded signalling me to go on “She has anxiety and depression, it’s why she smokes, it brings down her anxiety, and takes the edge off. But, I talked to her yesterday, and I thought I had helped her, but she posted something on Instagram with a worrying caption that said “Yikes… remember when I was truly happy? Yeah me either.” Then she had lashed out on her friends who were just worried about her, asking if she was okay. I thought - I thought I could help her. Now she won’t even respond to my text messages and calls.” I told Yoongi and he sighed_ **

**_“Kihyun, when someone has that much pain in their heart, one little talking too, is not going to help it go away, it takes years for that pain and numbness to go away, and it also takes the right person, for it to go away - not saying you’re not the right person. But, you’re just going to have to help her out, and be there for her, so she can get fully happy.” Yoongi told me, and I thought about what he had just said. He’s right, one talk is not going to take away all that pain that has been building up for years, it takes the right person to help you out of that shell… I just hope that I can help her - I feel like I can’t help her truly be happy, and that makes me scared - no terrified._ **

**A/N**

**Here’s chapter 15!!!**

**Oooh so angsty haha!!**

**It’s gonna get more sad from here don’t worry haha!**

**But there officially 5 more chapters left !!**

**DON’T BE A SILENT READER, SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS!!!**

**[RAELEE]**


	19. 16: Kêêþ håñgïñg ðñ

**16: Kêêþ håñgïñg ðñ**

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

**I really don’t think I can hang out on this one this time! I swear everything feels like it’s just dropping down on me, and it makes me feel like I physically can’t breathe. I have been having to take my anxiety meds, more frequently, because of how many panic attacks I’ve been getting. I can’t handle this anymore. I had my arms hanging onto the railing of the bridge, as I take in the sweet and salty breath of air, one of these days, could be my last day… I should probably say goodbye to my friends, and make the best of it. But that would leave them crushed… I really don’t know what to do anymore. I look over in the corner of my eye, and I can see Kihyun standing right beside me… oh god, please Kihyun just go away, I can’t talk to you right now. “Hey, Jasey.” Kihyun greets and I sighed**

**“Hey.” I whisper, and we were silent for a couple of seconds and he was about to speak up but I beat him to it “Can you please let me be alone right now, Kihyun?” I ask him, basically telling him to leave me alone. But he doesn’t do that. He stays. Like a good boyfriend he is.**

**“I really want to talk to you, Jasey.” Kihyun told me and I sighed**

**“Kihyun, can you please leave me alone? I want to be alone right now.” I told him and he sighed**

**“Jasey, it’s not healthy to shut people out like this, you need someone to help you.” Kihyun told me, and I just felt my blood had started to boil, I don’t know why it just did. I gripped the railing, fingers turning white, and I sighed**

**“Kihyun, for the last time, please just go.” I say calmly - well as calm as I could muster**

**“Jasey, I’m not leaving until you talk to me.” Kihyun told me and I rolled my eyes**

**“Well, you’re gonna be here, until you’re dead, because I’m not going to talk.” I snap and he looked surprised at my actions**

**“What has gotten into you, Jasey?” Kihyun asked me and I had a tighter grip on the railing**

**“Life. Got. Into. Me.” I say slowly**

**“Jasey, it’s going to be -” Kihyun says but i had cut him off by turning to him**

**“If you say it’s going to be okay, I’m going to hurt you.” I say to him and he widened his eyes**

**“Jasey, what happened?” Kihyun asked me and I scoffed**

**“Kihyun, I’m so sick and tired of everyone telling me ‘it’s going to be okay’, when in reality it’s not! My mom told me it was going to be okay, when my dad died, Changkyun told me it was going to be okay when Jungkook broke up with me, my fucking therapist told me it was going to be okay, when we were talking about my anxiety, but it’s all just a bunch of bullshit!” I yell**

**“Why can’t you just realize that you have someone who loves and cares for you?” Kihyun asked me his voice having more grit than ever**

**“Because, nobody really gives a shit! Everybody always acts they care for me, but when I start to get vulnerable and show weakness, they always leave me.” I exclaimed**

**“But I’m still here! So is Changkyun, Jooheon, Hyunwoo, Hyungwon, Hoseok, and Minhyuk! We’re all here for Jasey, why can’t you just realize that?!” Kihyun yelled, and I rolled my eyes**

**“Because it’s a bunch of bullshit! God, are you even listening?!” I yelled and he rolled his eyes**

**“You know what, why do I even bother? You’re obviously not going to listen. What I was originally going to say before you blew up in my face, was to keep hanging on, because I know you can do it. But keep hanging on, by yourself, because I’m done.” Kihyun told me and he walked off and I was shocked… did he just break up with me? I felt that pain in my chest slowly build up, and it takes about all of me, to not cry, as he walked off from me. God, why do I always screw everything up? Once I realize that no one is near or around me, I let my tears loose, and I let my legs go down to the concrete and I began to sob very hard, to the point where I couldn’t breathe, was how hard I was crying. I always do that. I always lash out on someone I love way too much. I love him so much, I can’t believe I just did that. Instead of lashing out on him, I could’ve let him help me, instead he just broke up with me.**

**\---**

**_Kihyun’s P.O.V_ **

**_*Minutes before*_ **

**_I was walking, just having to clear my mind about Jasey, but speak of the devil, I saw her. She was wearing some black shorts, an orange crop - tank top, with a black leather jacket covering it, and some converse, she had her hair up in a messy bun, and she was leaning against the railing of the bridge, and I sighed. I decided to walk over to her, so I can speak with her. “Hey.” I greet and she looked at me in the corner of her eyes_ **

**_“Hey.” She whispered, and we were silent for a couple of seconds and I was about to speak up but she beat me to it “Can you please let me be alone right now, Kihyun?” She asked me, basically telling me to leave her alone. But I didn’t. I couldn’t just leave her, when she’s in this state. What kind of boyfriend would I be if I just left her?_ **

**_“I really want to talk to you, Jasey.” I told her and she sighed_ **

**_“Kihyun, can you please leave me alone? I want to be alone right now.” She told me and I had sighed, I can’t leave her like this._ **

**_“Jasey, it’s not healthy to shut people out like this, you need someone to help you.” I told her, and from here, I could see her blood start to boil, and I saw she had started to grip on the railing with her fingers turning white, and she sighed_ **

**_“Kihyun, for the last time, please just go.” She says to me calmly, but I still didn’t listen to her_ **

**_“Jasey, I’m not leaving until you talk to me.” I told her and that had made her roll her eyes_ **

**_“Well, you’re gonna be here, until you’re dead, because I’m not going to talk.” She snaps and I was surprised by her actions and her choice of words_ **

**_“What has gotten into you, Jasey?” I asked her and she had a tighter grip on the railing_ **

**_“Life. Got. Into. Me.” She says slowly_ **

**_“Jasey, it’s going to be -” I say but she had cut me off by turning over to me to face me, and to be honest, she looked pissed off_ **

**_“If you say it’s going to be okay, I’m going to hurt you.” She says to me and I widened my eyes_ **

**_“Jasey, what happened?” I asked her and she scoffed_ **

**_“Kihyun, I’m so sick and tired of everyone telling me ‘it’s going to be okay’, when in reality it’s not! My mom told me it was going to be okay, when my dad died, Changkyun told me it was going to be okay when Jungkook broke up with me, my fucking therapist told me it was going to be okay, when we were talking about my anxiety, but it’s all just a bunch of bullshit!” She yells, and I then felt myself get a little bit irritated at what she was saying_ **

**_“Why can’t you just realize that you have someone who loves and cares for you?” I had asked her my voice having more grit than ever_ **

**_“Because, nobody really gives a shit! Everybody always acts they care for me, but when I start to get vulnerable and show weakness, they always leave me.” She exclaimed, and that made me just lose it_ **

**_“But I’m still here! So is Changkyun, Jooheon, Hyunwoo, Hyungwon, Hoseok, and Minhyuk! We’re all here for Jasey, why can’t you just realize that?!” I yelled and that just made her roll her eyes, and I got so irked because of it_ **

**_“Because it’s a bunch of bullshit! God, are you even listening?!” She yelled and what she had said, made me roll my eyes as well_ **

**_“You know what, why do I even bother? You’re obviously not going to listen. What I was originally going to say before you blew up in my face, was to keep hanging on, because I know you can do it. But keep hanging on, by yourself, because I’m done.” I told her and I had walked off, and I felt my chest get heavy. I just broke up with her. Why did I do that? I could’ve just told her to calm down, or let her rant and rave, and then told her all those things I was going to say, but I let my stupid brain take over what my heart was going to say… ugh I’m such an idiot! I can’t believe I just did that to her. I felt the tears leave my eyes, and it took every bit of me, not to just break down crying right now on this sidewalk. What the hell am I going to do? Ugh, Jasey, I’m so sorry!_ **

**A/N**

**Here’s chapter 16!!**

**Uh oh, Jasey and Kihyun just broke up!!**

**But, it will not be like for a couple of chapters and such nahhh it’s going to be a while before I get them back together**

**Oh yeah, there are only 4 more chapters left!!**

**DON’T BE A SILENT READER, SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS!!**

**[RAELEE]**


	20. 17: Ì lðvê ¥ðµ

**17: Ì lðvê ¥ðµ**

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

**I wake up, hoping that yesterday was just a really bad nightmare, but then I remember… it wasn’t, it was real. That really happened. All I could think about was how I fucked up my only chance of real happiness, and now I don’t think I can ever be happy again, knowing that my only source of happiness, hates me now… it just hurts. I opened my phone, and I went through some stuff, and I saw the first picture Kihyun had taken when we were hanging out that day 3 months ago.**

*** _Flashback_ ***

_**I sat my phone down on a bench, as my shoes became untied, I really don’t know how they did, but they did. Once I looked up, I see Kihyun has my phone, and I rolled my eyes “Are you serious?” I ask him and he looked at me** _

_**“What? I just wanted to post this to your Instagram.” Kihyun told me and he showed me the picture that he was posting to my Instagram** _

_**…. “Great, now my friends think we’re dating.” I say to him and he smiled** _

_**“I could always just tell them, I’m in a relationship.” Kihyun told me and I felt my heart just crack… he has a girlfriend? Of course he does, Jasey. He’s a real good looking guy, who you just met, like last week.** _

_**“You’re in a relationship?” I ask him and he sighed and looked down at the ground** _

_**“It’s complicated.” Kihyun told me and I was confused on what he meant, but I just dropped it, because I don’t want him to like hate me, because you know that would suck.** _

***FLASHBACK OVER***

**I went over to the posts and I decided I was going to post that photo again, and I had a very detailed caption on that post, and I also turned the comments off, because I really can’t deal with the comments right about now. I don’t want Kihyun to comment on this post, or my friends, I just want people to see it, without saying anything bad about me.**

****

***16,000 Hearts***

**JaseyBearrrr: I remember when you first put this photo on my Instagram, three months ago, and that it had caught a lot of attention to my followers and my friends, everyone thinking we were in a relationship… man those were the simple times. Then we had actually gotten together, and everything felt so beautiful and so wholesome, and I knew you were the right one for me… but we would’ve lasted longer, if I hadn’t had fucked it up… I’m so so so so sorry, Kihyun. You deserve so much better than a gone girl like me.**   
****

**_*COMMENTS ARE DISABLED FOR THIS POST*_ **

**I sighed as i put my phone down on my bed, and I then thought about calling Kihyun, apologizing to him, hoping that we could start over and be good, because I really can’t live without him… I know that is the worst thing to hear in a relationship, but I’m serious this time. I physically can’t live without him. I picked up my phone again, and I went over to my contacts, and I clicked on Kihyun’s contact, and I waited for it to ring. I heard dial tones, ring for a few seconds, and then it just went straight to voicemail.**

**‘Hey, this is Yoo Kihyun, I can’t come to the phone right now, but I’ll get back to you as soon as I can, leave a message after the little beep.’ His voicemail said and after I heard the beep, I was silent for a couple of seconds, until I had spoke up**

**“H-hey, Kihyun, it’s uh, it’s Jasey. I wanted to say that I’m really sorry for lashing out on you like that yesterday. I know I do have people who care about me, and who are there for me. It’s just the anxiety and the depression is weighing me down, and it’s making me feel like I’m so useless to everyone. If you get this and you don’t call me back, I’ll get it, and I’ll do exactly what you told me to do, keep hanging on, on my own. But, if you get this and you do call me back, I just want to say I’m so sorry. Kihyun, I really hope you know that I really am sorry. And I uh - oh god, how do I say this? I love you, Kihyun.” I say while I had began crying half way through, and I hung up the phone, and I lay back down on my bed feeling everything just crumble on me.**

**\---**

**_Kihyun’s P.O.V_ **

**_I put my dirty dishes in the dishwasher, and I went back upstairs, to get my phone, and I saw there was a missed call from Jasey. Why would Jasey, call me? I saw that she left me a voicemail, and I open it and I began to listen to it, and I heard she was silent, and I was about to delete it, until I heard she started to speak up ‘H-hey, Kihyun, it’s uh, it’s Jasey. I wanted to say that I’m really sorry for lashing out on you like that yesterday. I know I do have people who care about me, and who are there for me. It’s just the anxiety and the depression is weighing me down, and it’s making me feel like I’m so useless to everyone. If you get this and you don’t call me back, I’ll get it, and I’ll do exactly what you told me to do, keep hanging on, on my own. But, if you get this and you do call me back, I just want to say I’m so sorry. Kihyun, I really hope you know that I really am sorry. And I uh - oh god, how do I say this? I love you, Kihyun.’ She said, and I heard she started to cry half way through the message, and I sighed and I deleted the message, and I went to go through my Instagram, but when I opened it, I saw the first post was Jasey, and it was the first picture, I posted on Jasey’s Instagram, but that wasn’t what caught my attention, what caught my attention was the caption_ **

**_‘JaseyBearrrr: I remember when you first put this photo on my Instagram, three months ago, and that it had caught a lot of attention to my followers and my friends, everyone thinking we were in a relationship… man those were the simple times. Then we had actually gotten together, and everything felt so beautiful and so wholesome, and I knew you were the right one for me… but we would’ve lasted longer, if I hadn’t had fucked it up… I’m so so so so sorry, Kihyun. You deserve so much better than a gone girl like me.’ She was right. I do deserve so much better, I went ahead and blocked her on Instagram, and I sighed softly. I don’t know what to do now. I guess, I can basically live my life, knowing that me and her aren’t together. She did say that if I got her voicemail and didn’t call her back, she would keep hanging on, on her own. I trust, that she would do that._ **


	21. 18: Ìgñðrïñg åll †hð§ê wårñïñg§

**18: Ìgñðrïñg åll †hð§ê wårñïñg§**

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

**Kihyun, didn’t call me back. He really didn’t call me back. I know I told him that I would keep hanging on, by myself, if he didn’t call me back. But I don’t think I can do this on my own. I don’t think I can physically keep holding on right now. I walk inside the school building with everyone just staring at me, probably because I looked like a total wreck. I had literal tears rolling down my face, my eyes were red, my cheeks were blotchy, and I also had eyebags. This is so difficult to deal with… oh my god, Jungkook was right, Kihyun was just going to hurt me. He was right. Kihyun did hurt me. And even though Kihyun hurt me, I still love him, because he makes me happy more than he does with hurting me. I walked over to my locker and I saw my friends walking over to me, and I felt it getting hard to keep in my emotions… oh boy. I saw Changkyun walk over to me, and it was really hard for me to hold it in “Jaseybear, are you okay?” Changkyun asked me in a soft voice, and I felt the tears leave my eyes, and I began to quietly sob, and Changkyun pulls me into a hug, and I hugged him back tightly, crying into his shoulder**

**“I-I’m s-sorry.” I cried**

**“Shh, shh, it’s okay.” Changkyun whispered and we both pulled back, and I had wiped the tears away and I groaned, leaning against the lockers**

**“You want to talk about it?” Hyunwoo asked me and I nodded**

**“Yeah.” I say to him, and they had started to lead me to our little hangout spot.**

**\---**

**“Well, what happened?” Jooheon asked me gently and I sighed**

**“Well, it all started that day, where I stayed in bed until like 5pm, and Kihyun, had came over to cheer me up, and it worked but it really wasn’t enough to make me feel truly happy. Then I had lashed out on you guys the next day, which by the way, I’m so sorry for doing that. But, anyway, Kihyun came to see me at the bridge a day later, and I had lashed out on him, and he also blew up, basically breaking up with me, and me being the idiot I am, I let him do that, and I didn't do anything about it until yesterday, leaving him a voicemail, basically saying that I love him and I’m sorry, but I told him this one thing, that I now regret saying, which was ‘If you get this and you don’t call me back, I’ll get it, and I’ll do exactly what you told me to do, keep hanging on, on my own.’ And I’m pretty sure he got the voicemail, but he didn’t call me back, and he also blocked me on Instagram.” I say to them, kicking a pebble on the asphalt**

**“You guys, need a little bit of space from each other, but when the wound heals you guys will go back to each other.” Hyungwon told me and I sighed, I hope that’s true, but Kihyun made it pretty clear that he was done**

**“He uh said, ‘Why do I even bother?’ That’s one of the worst things that I could hear in a relationship, it has the same meaning as ‘You were just a waste of my time’.” I say, and then I hear the bell ring, and I sighed… time to go back to hell**

**“Come on, guys, let’s go.” Hoseok says and we all stood up and we began to make our way to our classes**

**\---**

****

***13,000 Hearts***

**JaseyBearrrr: When you first met this person of your dreams, you just hope to god that he never leaves you, but when you make one mistake. One mistake can change everything. And that’s exactly what I did. Made one stupid mistake. I ignored all those warnings my heart was telling me, and I just let it all out, when I was not supposed to.**   
****

**PIC CRED: THE LOVE OF MY LIFE WHO HAS BLOCKED ME**

**Comments: @Honeybee: Oh my god, this caption is so true!**   
****

**@Sleepwon: This caption hurts sadly**

**@IAMWHATIAM: It’ll be okay, Jaseybear, it’s only temporary  
@MuscleBunny: @Sleepwon What are you talking about, it was just a small argument  
@PapaBear: The simple times were before you two met  
@SunshineHyukie: Kihyun is a coward!  
@KarenLee: I feel so sorry for you, if only I can get through his stupid thick head**

**\---**

**_Kihyun’s P.O.V_ **

**_“Kihyun, why can’t you just see that she is hurting?!” Karen yelled at me and I sighed, looking up from my homework_ **

**_“Karen, I don’t have time for this.” I say to her, and I then hear my phone started to ring, and I look over to see the caller ID and it said ‘JaseyMuffin’ and I sighed and I declined the call_ **

**_“Kihyun!” Karen exclaimed, and I then saw there was a voicemail left on my phone, and I played it_ **

**_‘Hey, Kihyun, I know you really don’t want to talk to me anymore, I get that, but can’t you see that I’m so sorry, I’m just an idiot who really doesn’t know how to have a functioning relationship… I’m so sorry, Kihyun. I love you.’ The voicemail said and I sighed and I deleted the voicemail. That’s like 10th voicemail I’ve deleted from her, and to be honest, it’s getting annoying at this point._ **

**_“Don’t you see or I don’t know hear, how hurt she is?” Karen asked me and I groaned_ **

**_“Karen.” I say in a warning tone_ **

**_“Don’t use that fucking tone with me, Kihyun, we’re not in high school anymore.” Karen snaps and she pulled out her phone and I looked down at my homework “You wanna know about her newest post? You wanna hear the caption?” Karen asked me_ **

**_“Not really.” I say not really caring_ **

**_“Too bad, you’re gonna hear it anyway.” Karen told me and I groaned “It says ‘ When you first met this person of your dreams, you just hope to god that he never leaves you, but when you make one mistake. One mistake can change everything. And that’s exactly what I did. Made one stupid mistake. I ignored all those warnings my heart was telling me, and I just let it all out, when I was not supposed to.’ The picture credit also says: the love of my life who blocked me.” Karen told me and I just continued looking down at my homework_ **

**_“Is that it?” I ask her and she sighed and let a scream out, out of frustration_ **

**_“You’re such an asshole!” She yelled at me and then stormed off, and I let out a sigh of relief as I could finally get back to my homework… finally some peace and quiet. But, hearing that recent voicemail from Jasey, she sounded more frustrated than sad, but there is nothing I could really do about it. She had made her choice to shut me out, and everyone she loves out. She made that decision, and she has to live with those consequences. I know this is making me sound like a dick, but it’s the same thing I had to do, when Maeve died, face with those consequences. Same thing when both of my parents died. Deal with it._ **

**A/N**

**Here’s chapter 18!!**

**I don’t know why, I’m making Kihyun such an ass at the end of this story haha!! Sorry!!**

**There are officially 2 more chapters left in this story, and I will have the last two chapters up today!!**

**DON’T BE A SILENT READER, SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS!!!**

**[RAELEE]**


	22. 19: Wïll ¥ðµ þlêå§ê þï¢k µþ †hê £µ¢kïñg þhðñê?

**19: Wïll ¥ðµ þlêå§ê þï¢k µþ †hê £µ¢kïñg þhðñê?**

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

***Part 1***

***1 week later***

**It’s been a week since what had happened with me and Kihyun, and I’ve felt everything just start to crumble down upon me. I know I told Kihyun, I would try to keep holding on, but I just can’t. I really can’t. After the 20th time of Kihyun not picking up my phone calls or answering my text messages, I’ve decided to just give up… I’m going to give up today. I’m going to do what I should’ve done 4 months ago. The day I met Yoo Kihyun. Me and the boys are going to go out drinking today, so they can help me take my mind off what has been happening, and I’m always so grateful for them to always be by my side, but I feel so sorry to leave them like this. I’m going to go jump off that bridge, while I’m wasted, like I was supposed to do that day. No one is going to be able to stop me. No one. Not my parents. Not my siblings. Not my friends. And especially not Yoo Kihyun. I decided I was going to post one last Instagram post, so my last post isn’t me being depressing. I need to bring the light into the darkness on my last day in this world.**

****

***15,000 Hearts***

**JaseyBearrrr: I’ve always liked this photo, thanks to the lovely @IAMWHATIAM for taking it, love you Changkyunnie!!**

**Comments: @Honeybee: When in the hell was this picture taken?**   
****

**@Sleepwon: When are you going to show your beautiful face to your Instagram??**

**@IAMWHATIAM: I love you too Jaseybear!**

**@MuscleBunny: Wow the colors are sooo pretty  
@PapaBear: When was this taken? Because I don’t remember this being taken?  
@SunshineHyukie: Wahh so gorgeous!!  
@KarenLee: Wow Changkyun should become a photographer**

**\---**

**It was finally after school, and I was hanging out with Changkyun and the boys, and Hyungwon is finally going to come out drinking with us, instead of sleeping. I decided to call Kihyun one last time, before we go to the bar, and before I decide to leave this world completely. I click on Kihyun’s contact, and I call him. Hearing the dial tones ring a few times, then it went to voicemail as usual. ‘‘Hey, this is Yoo Kihyun, I can’t come to the phone right now, but I’ll get back to you as soon as I can, leave a message after the little beep.’ His voicemail says, I swear to god I’ve heard this voicemail way too much, that I can completely mesmerize it with my eyes closed**

**“Hey, Kihyun, I know that I said I was going to stop calling you, but this time I need to tell you how sorry I am. I’m so sorry, like deadly sorry. Like I could go jump off the bridge sorry. I just love you so much, and I was in over my head, thinking that nobody wanted to be with me and that nobody cared for me, I know that now. Now Kihyun, will you please pick up the fucking phone?!” I say, leaving in tiny hints about what’s going to happen, tonight, but I had completely let my frustration blow over, and I yelled that last sentence.**

**“Hey, Jasey, let’s go.” Changkyun told me and I nodded, and I put my phone in my back pocket, and I began to follow him out of the room and out of the house. So we can go over to the bar, and get completely wasted.**

**\---**

**_Kihyun’s P.O.V_ **

**_I was hanging out with Yoongi and I heard my phone ring, and I sighed annoyed, knowing that it was Jasey. I swear to god, she’s called me over three dozen times, when will she get it, that I’m not going to pick up? “What’s up with you?” Yoongi asked me as he took a swig of his beer_ **

**_“It’s Jasey, again.” I tell him and he sighed_ **

**_“Why don’t you just answer her?” He asked me and I shook my head_ **

**_“No, what she said really hurt me and really pissed me off.” I tell him_ **

**_“So giving her the silent treatment, is not pissing her off or hurting her? Have you been listening to her voicemails?” Yoongi asked and I nodded_ **

**_“Yeah, I listened to all of them, and delete them.” I tell him and he rolled his eyes_ **

**_“Well, did she leave another one?” Yoongi asked and I sighed_ **

**_“It wouldn’t be Jasey, if she didn’t leave a voicemail.” I told him, and to be sure enough there was a voicemail, and I pressed play_ **

**_‘Hey, Kihyun, I know that I said I was going to stop calling you, but this time I need to tell you how sorry I am. I’m so sorry, like deadly sorry. Like I could go jump off the bridge sorry. I just love you so much, and I was in over my head, thinking that nobody wanted to be with me and that nobody cared for me, I know that now. Now Kihyun, will you please pick up the fucking phone?!’ She said, and she had yelled that last sentence and I was shocked and so was Yoongi_ **

**_“This is what happens when you don’t answer the phone after 21 times of leaving the same fucking voicemail.” Yoongi told me and I sighed, and I then did the same thing I always do… delete the voicemail._ **

**\---**

**Jasey's P.O.V**

***2:40 AM***

**The guys had left like 30 minutes ago, and I was left here still drinking, because I told them, I would go home by myself. Which kinda worried them, but I told them, I would be okay. This is where I’m going to end it. I stumble out of the bar, after the bartender cutting me off from drinking anymore, and I had stumbled over to the bridge. I looked over the bridge and I then started to get a little shaky. Like my palms were sweating, and my heart was starting to get tight, my breathing was becoming uneven. “I can do this. I can do this.” I slurred out the words, reassuring myself that I can do this. I was about to put my hands on the bridge, railing, but I felt myself start to shake when I get near it. I can’t do this. I can’t do this! I need Kihyun. I then begin to stumble over to Kihyun, to see if he’s home. I hope he’s home. I just hope he’s home.**

**\---**

**I finally made it over to his house, after throwing up a couple of times, but I made it. I pounded on the door, feeling completely sobered up, and I was waiting for the person to open up the door. As I saw the door opening, I half expected to see Kihyun… but I saw Karen. Shit. “Jasey?” Karen asked rubbing the sleep out of her eyes**

**“Is Kihyun here?” I ask her and she shook her head**

**“He’s not here, he’s hanging out with Yoongi. Jasey, are you okay?” Karen asked me, but I couldn’t handle it, I ran off from her, and I began running back over to the bridge. I need Kihyun. I need him. I can’t do this. I can’t do it.**

**TO BE CONTINUED**

**A/N**

**Here’s part 1 of the two part finale!!**

**I’m so excited to write the last chapter!!**

**There is one more chapter left and ahh I’m so excited!!**

**DON’T BE A SILENT READER, SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS!!**

**[RAELEE]**


	23. 20: Ì†'§ 3åm... ågåïñ, ¢ðmê åñÐ §åvê mê

***Part 2***

**_Kihyun’s P.O.V_ **

**_I was hanging out with Yoongi and I heard my phone ring, and I sighed annoyed, knowing that it was Jasey. I swear to god, she’s called me over three dozen times, when will she get it, that I’m not going to pick up? “What’s up with you?” Yoongi asked me as he took a swig of his beer_ **

**_“It’s Jasey, again.” I tell him and he sighed_ **

**_“Why don’t you just answer her?” He asked me and I shook my head_ **

**_“No, what she said really hurt me and really pissed me off.” I tell him_ **

**_“So giving her the silent treatment, is not pissing her off or hurting her? Have you been listening to her voicemails?” Yoongi asked and I nodded_ **

**_“Yeah, I listened to all of them, and delete them.” I tell him and he rolled his eyes_ **

**_“Well, did she leave another one?” Yoongi asked and I sighed_ **

**_“It wouldn’t be Jasey, if she didn’t leave a voicemail.” I told him, and to be sure enough there was a voicemail, and I pressed play_ **

**_‘Hey, Kihyun, I know that I said I was going to stop calling you, but this time I need to tell you how sorry I am. I’m so sorry, like deadly sorry. Like I could go jump off the bridge sorry. I just love you so much, and I was in over my head, thinking that nobody wanted to be with me and that nobody cared for me, I know that now. Now Kihyun, will you please pick up the fucking phone?!’ She said, and she had yelled that last sentence and I was shocked and so was Yoongi_ **

**_“This is what happens when you don’t answer the phone after 21 times of leaving the same fucking voicemail.” Yoongi told me and I sighed, and I then did the same thing I always do… delete the voicemail._ **

**\---**

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

***2:40 AM***

**The guys had left like 30 minutes ago, and I was left here still drinking, because I told them, I would go home by myself. Which kinda worried them, but I told them, I would be okay. This is where I’m going to end it. I stumble out of the bar, after the bartender cutting me off from drinking anymore, and I had stumbled over to the bridge. I looked over the bridge and I then started to get a little shaky. Like my palms were sweating, and my heart was starting to get tight, my breathing was becoming uneven. “I can do this. I can do this.” I slurred out the words, reassuring myself that I can do this. I was about to put my hands on the bridge, railing, but I felt myself start to shake when I get near it. I can’t do this. I can’t do this! I need Kihyun. I then begin to stumble over to Kihyun, to see if he’s home. I hope he’s home. I just hope he’s home.**

**\---**

**I finally made it over to his house, after throwing up a couple of times, but I made it. I pounded on the door, feeling completely sobered up, and I was waiting for the person to open up the door. As I saw the door opening, I half expected to see Kihyun… but I saw Karen. Shit. “Jasey?” Karen asked rubbing the sleep out of her eyes**

**“Is Kihyun here?” I ask her and she shook her head**

**“He’s not here, he’s hanging out with Yoongi. Jasey, are you okay?” Karen asked me, but I couldn’t handle it, I ran off from her, and I began running back over to the bridge. I need Kihyun. I need him. I can’t do this. I can’t do it. I looked at the time on my phone, and it said ‘3:00 AM’. Shit! I clicked on Kihyun’s contact and I called him, hearing the dial tones, and I began crying as I heard his voicemail again…**

**“Please Kihyun, don’t do this to me… not now!” I cried, feeling tears roll down my face in desperation**

**‘Hey, this is Yoo Kihyun, I can’t come to the phone right now, but I’ll get back to you as soon as I can, leave a message after the little beep.’ The voicemail said and I was already sobbing when the beep had stopped**

**“Kihyun, I- I can’t do this. I - I - Kihyun, I’m so sorry, I’m such a fuck up. I can’t even fucking kill myself right, Kihyun baby, it’s 3am… again, please come and save me. Please I don’t think I can handle this. Please, please, please, Kihyun, you’re my only source of happiness! Please, Kihyun!” I say sobbing my poor heart out, and I turned around to the bridge railing and I held onto the railing and tried to calm down… knowing that Kihyun will not come and save me.**

**_Kihyun’s P.O.V_ **

**_I was at Yoongi’s house, just playing some video games, and I hear my phone ring, and I groaned, and I paused the game, and I saw it was from Jasey, and I sighed and I declined it again, and I look over to Yoongi, and he rolled his eyes_ **

**_“Bro, do you seriously have to decline her again?” Yoongi asked me and I sighed_ **

**_“She’s probably going to say the same thing as she always says.” I tell him and was about unpause the game, until Yoongi just gave me my phone_ **

**_“Listen to her voicemail, maybe it’s something different.” Yoongi told me and I rolled my eyes and sighed and I clicked on her voicemail and in the first second I heard sobbing, and I looked over at Yoongi, who looked confused_ **

**_‘Kihyun, I- I can’t do this. I - I - Kihyun, I’m so sorry, I’m such a fuck up. I can’t even fucking kill myself right, Kihyun baby, it’s 3am… again, please come and save me. Please I don’t think I can handle this. Please, please, please, Kihyun, you’re my only source of happiness! Please, Kihyun!’ She cried, and I widened my eyes and I stood up_ **

**_“She’s at the bridge. She was at the bridge that day. She was going to kill herself?” I ask myself_ **

**_“Well why are you still here? Go to her, before you lose her forever!” Yoongi told me and when I heard the word forever, it made me feel so scared about what Jasey, might even do. I grabbed my shoes and I ran out of the house, and I began to run to the bridge which is like a 10 minute walk from here_ **

**\---**

**Jasey’s P.O.V**

**It has been 10 minutes, and I’m kind of convinced that Kihyun is not going to come and save me. I’m sorry Kihyun. I stood up and I swung my leg over the railing, and as I was about swing my other leg over the bridge, I felt myself being pulled back and I was in someone’s arms, and that person held on tightly. “Don’t you dare leave me!” I hear that voice cry, and I then realize it was Kihyun… he came. I felt his tears just fall on my neck, and my jacket and his body was shaking from how hard he was crying. I turned around to face him and I hugged him tightly**

**“I’m so sorry!” I cried burying my face in his shoulder**

**“Please don’t leave me.” Kihyun begged and I held onto him tightly and I placed a gentle kiss on his neck and we both pulled back and we both leaned our foreheads together**

**“You came. You saved me.” I whisper and Kihyun placed a kiss on my cheek**

**“I’m so sorry, for ignoring all those messages and not answering you. I’m so sorry to leave you alone to deal with this. I’m the worst boyfriend ever. I’m the worst person in the whole world.” Kihyun cried, tears rolling down his face, lips trembling and I shook my head**

**“No. Shhh, it’s not your fault. I’m the one who should apologize, I’m the one who lashed out on you, I deserve everything that’s happened in this week.” I tell him and he shook his head and he cupped my cheeks**

**“I love you too.” Kihyun says and I smiled feeling the tears roll down my face, and I kissed him and it was a long and passionate one. I thought I would be ending my life today, if it wasn’t for Kihyun actually showing up and pulling me off that bridge. I’m so thankful for having him in my life. I would never want to be with anybody else, other than Kihyun. I love him so much.**

**\---**

***Timeskip: 1 month later***

**“I want to show my face on my Instagram now.” I tell Kihyun randomly and he looked over at me and he was shocked**

**“Really?” He asked me and I nodded**

**“I feel like I’m ready to be judged for my looks, I mean not everyone is going to think I’m pretty, so I can’t really pussyfoot out of it.” I tell him and he laughed at my choice of words**

**“Alright.” He told me and I smiled and I placed a kiss on his cheek, and I looked through the pictures of myself and I had picked my favorite one which Kihyun took yesterday night, when we were on a date, and I decided to post it**

****

***20,000 Hearts***

**JaseyBearrrr: Heyyyy, so uhh no aesthetic posts or pictures of my boyfriend, this is an actual face reveal!! Yea this is me. Jasey Ryan Kim. Pretty shocking right? Yeah, I didn’t expect to do this, I just thought about it and decided to do this. I’ve always had no courage to show you guys what I look like, because I thought you guys would think I was ugly. So, I’m just gonna leave this here. This was taken on me and @HamsterHyun’s date last night (love you Kiki). I’m so happy to finally share what I look like!**   
****

**PIC CRED: @HamsterHyun**

**Comments: @Honeybee: Omg girl finally!! Jazzy, you look so pretty!!**   
****

**@Sleepwon: I was waiting for you to show everyone what you look like**

**@IAMWHATIAM: Jaseybear, you look so cute!!**

**@MuscleBunny: Wow, you look so happy!!  
@PapaBear: I’ve never seen you so happy, Jasey, it makes me happy  
@SunshineHyukie: Wow, I want a man who can take pictures of me smiling like this!!  
@KarenLee: Wow you have so much balls to show yourself, I’m proud of you!  
@HamsterHyun: I love you baby!**

**Apart from my friends supporting comments, many of my followers, were calling me pretty, gorgeous, stunning, etc… I also saw that Kihyun had posted a photo of me to his Instagram for his followers to see… oh Jesus!**

****

***20,000 Hearts***

**HamsterHyun: I would like to proudly announce that this beautiful girl is my girlfriend Jasey or also known as @JaseyBearrrr she’s the most perfect and precious girl I’ve ever met in my life. Yea, she does have some flaws, but the flaws are what make her perfect in my eyes. She had no courage to post her face on her Instagram, so show her some love. Because my precious baby girl needs all the love in the world. Love you Jaseymuffin!!**   
****

**Also I took this picture of Jasey, 2 weeks ago, where I had called her and she had this face.**

**All of his comments, were really supportive as well, and that made me happy to see that everyone is so supportive of me. I thought when I did a face reveal, everyone - minus my friends and Kihyun, would call me ugly and tell me to delete the post. I’m just happy that people made me feel like I could really love myself. I look over at Kihyun and he smiled and I hugged him from the side, and he placed his head on mine, and I smiled. When I first met Kihyun, I was ready to end it all, but after he came into my life, there have been a few times of ups and downs, but without him, I probably wouldn’t even be here. Kihyun is literally my source of happiness. He makes me so happy that it wouldn’t look like I have depression or anxiety. I thought I really had no purpose in this world, but Kihyun made sure I did have some purpose in this world. Kihyun, has changed me so much, that I stopped wearing such dark clothes, I started to get along with my step father, even calling him dad. I’ve also gotten a better relationship with my brothers, going on family vacations, and just being an all around happy person, like I was when little. I like to thank Kihyun for all of this. This crazy journey had all started on a bridge at 3am when I wasted, it ended on a bridge at 3am. “Kihyun.” I say and Kihyun looks over at me with a smile**

**“Yes?” He asked me and I smiled softly**

**“I love you.” I tell him and he looked at me with this look of pure love in his eyes**

**“I love you too.” Kihyun told me and I kissed him softly and we pulled back, and we linked our pinky fingers together, and sealed it with our thumb**

**“This ring you had gotten me, is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen in the world.” I say to Kihyun, looking at my engagement ring… yeah that’s right. Engagement ring. Kihyun had proposed 1 week ago and I was just shocked at the sudden action but it made me feel very happy that I get to call this beautiful person in the world, my husband.**

**“But, I know what is more beautiful than that ring.” Kihyun says and I look at him**

**“Oh yeah? Who?” I asked knowing what Kihyun’s answer is going to be**

**“You.” Kihyun simply said and I laughed**

**“You’re so corny.” I nag and he chuckled**

**“That’s why you love me.” Kihyun says and I smiled**

**“Yeah, that’s why I even decided to be friends with you.” I tell him and he smiled and I leaned against him and I sigh contently. This is how I wanted my perfect love story to end. Being engaged to the perfect person in my life. Even though me and Kihyun’s relationship had ups and downs, I can say that being with him is what makes me want to get out of bed every morning.**

**And I wouldn’t change any of that.**

**A/N**

**Here’s chapter 20!!**

**AKA the final chapter!!**

**I’ve had so much fun with this story, this story has got to be one of my favorites that I have written, and ughh it’s just so amazing!!**

**Alright, so I will have another Kihyun story up sometime later this week, and yes this book is going to be a two part series, just a little shorter or I might have another book coming up, that is only going to be one story… I don’t know yet.**

**But I hope you guys enjoyed this story as much as I did!!**

**See you in the next story!!**

**DON’T BE A SILENT READER, SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS!!!**

**[RAELEE]**


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